My first column of the year reviewed the Cyclones’ position players in a format modeled on the famous Abbott and Costello routine, Who’s On First?

Since then, the Cyclones have been playing their own version, complete with the “I don’t know” on third base.

The Brooks started the season by losing their first seven games. The team didn’t panic, per se, but upper management made some quick moves to bolster the lineup.

Here’s how the “new, improved” Cyclones shape up.

Who’s On First — Now?

Junior Contreras wasn’t so junior at 6-foot-5 and 262 pounds, but he had trouble hitting the curve and the change-up. He was sent down to Kingsport and the Cyclones moved third baseman Tim Grogan to first.

Who’ll be on first tomorrow? Probably Junior. He’s batting .483 at Kingsport with three homers and three doubles in eight games — for a slugging percentage of .897.

What’s On Second — Now?

Two weeks ago, Armand Gaerlan was the Clones’ keystone. But Gaerlan was promoted to Hagerstown, and the Cyclones brought in Jon Schemmel to play second. Schemmel plays a fundamentally solid game, but he swings an inconsistent stick.

Waiting in the wings at Kingsport is Ivan Naccarata at Kingsport. After hitting a record three homers in one season into right field at Keyspan Park, Naccarata is hitting .563 in five games at Kingsport and slugging 1.063 with two homers.

Did someone say, “The Big Nac attack”?

I STILL Don’t Know on Third

Jon Malo is back in town. Malo was in Port St. Lucie, two steps above Brooklyn, where he was playing fairly regularly and hitting .253. Back in Brooklyn, he took the third-base job from Grogan.

I STILL Don’t Give a Darn (shortstop)

Jake Eigsti does give a darn. He’s is the only member of the infield’s opening-week line-up to stay in his position with Brooklyn. He has good range and hands, and is hitting .269.

Why (left field) — Now?

Elvis is still in the building. And still in left. That’s Elvis Cruz, and like his namesake, this Elvis likes showmanship. Unfortunately, he tried a one-handed catch of a simple fly ball that would have ended the game and have given Jacob Ruckle a complete game one-hit shut-out.

But Cruz embarrassingly dropped the ball, and Ruckle left the game (he was at his pitch-count limit). The Cyclones bullpen, fortunately for Cruz, retired the next batter to win the game.

Because (centerfield) — Now?

Opening-week starter Will Bashelor has been sent down to Kingsport and Joe Holden, who was hitting .300 at Hagerstown with six homers, was sent down to take his place.

Right Field — Now?

Although Abbott and Costello had no right fielder in their skit, the Cyclones have been using Dustin Martin and now Jonathan Sanchez, down from Hagerstown, in right.

Today (catcher) — Now?

Jason Jacobs is now doing the bulk of the receiving. He joined the Cyclones shortly after their opening-week debacle and has been a giant behind the dish, surviving full-on collisions. His hitting has, alas, been inconsistent.

Tomorrow (pitchers) — Now?

Jacob Ruckle (2–1) has excellent control and a fine change-up. The righty pitched a gem on July 6 (and again on July 12), allowing only a single hit and no walks in the aforementioned “shoulda-been” complete game against the Staten Island Yankees.

Jorge Reyes (0–3) is resuming his career after sitting out a 60-day suspension for steroid use. Returning to Brooklyn for the second year, the rightly has not pitched well, allowing 27 hits in only 16 innings with a 6.48 ERA.

Jeramy Simmons (2–2) has shown great control (only four walks in 21 innings).

Tobi Stoner has a 2.70 ERA and a 1–1 record. He impressed rehabbing Met star Cliff Floyd with his stuff. He also hit .420 in college — but unfortunately Cyclones pitchers don’t get to swing the stick.

Nelson Portillo (1–1) is a righty with good control, maintaining a 2.57 ERA.

Reliever Joe Smith, a right-hander with a submarine delivery, has proven to be an able closer (after a debacle in his first appearance in which he committed an error, walked a batter and hit a batter to force in a run). He has a 1.13 ERA.

Fellow right-hander Tim Haines is also a submariner. He’s 1–0 in seven appearances.

Lefty reliever Grady Hinchman – who has “the heart of a lion,” according to Cyclones’ pitching coach Hector Berrios — battles hitters all the way. A great competitor, he’s 1–0 with a 3.27 ERA.

©2006 The Brooklyn Paper