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Mac taken out right through the bars

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A 31-year-old woman learned that “size matters” on Aug. 7 when a long-armed thief pushed in the screen on her bedroom window and slipped a slim laptop between the window bars, police said.

Police report there are no leads on the whereabouts of the thin computer, which was stolen from the Henry Street apartment, near Pacific Street.

Caught

Police caught a man trying to escape Red Hook after burglarizing a mini-market on Lorraine Street between Columbia and Hicks streets on Aug. 18.

Officer Alfredo Brewster caught the man at 3:45 am, just minutes after he left the market with hundreds of dollars in random stolen goods, police said.

The hood had taken several bottles of Zima, a six-pack of Bitburger beer, three pairs of size-9 boots, two drills, a few power adaptors, and a stereo amplifier.

Rip-off artist

A pair of hoods pretending to be art enthusiasts nabbed a purse from a design and clothing gallery on Columbia Street on Aug. 12, police said.

The hucksters came in the gallery, which is near Degraw Street, at around 3:30 pm and asked the clerk about the art on display.

One member of the team — a woman — continued to query the clerk while her partner strolled around the shop.

The clerk said she suspected something was up when the two abruptly left without buying any of the art they had been interested in.

The pair was long gone by the time she noticed her wallet was missing. They got away with $45, a credit card and a silver and ruby ring.

The good son

A man lost his backpack in Long Island College Hospital on Aug. 17, police said

The man had left the bag in a hospital room while he walked his mother to surgery at around 7:45 pm.

An officer warned hospital visitors to not let their belonging out of view because “this stuff happens.”

Pool heist

A woman lost $1,400 worth of designer goods to a locker-room heist at the Red Hook Pool on Aug. 15, cops said.

The posh pool-goer locked up a $500 Prada backpack containing a pair of $500 sunglasses, a $100 wallet containing $200 in cash and a $100 cellphone before taking a dip at around 3:30 pm, police said. When she returned to her locker, the lock was busted and her belongings were gone.

Signs all over the public pool warn guests against stowing valuables in the dinky, metal lockers.

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