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2×4=Mayhem!

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2×4=MAYHEM!

Cops nabbed a construction worker who slugged a fellow hardhat in the head with 2×4 during a Nov. 8 dispute.

The workers were arguing about where to dump garbage at their Anthony Street job site at around 7:50 am, when one of the handymen chucked the lumber at the victim, who was sitting in an excavator at the time.

The wood beam shattered the excavator’s glass window and hit the victim, knocking the 40-year-old unconscious and cutting his face.

But police locked up a 45-year-old construction worker suspect of the assault, which occurred near the corner of Stewart Avenue.

Maker’s marked

Two crooks heisted whiskey and cash from a North Eighth Street watering hole on Nov. 3 while the barkeep was closing shop.

The thugs raised a half-closed roll gate at around 3:50 am and sauntered into the saloon, which is at the corner of Roebling Street.

“Oh, you’re closed?” one of the crooks asked the bartender as he flashed a boxcutter. “I’m not gonna hurt you. Give me the money.”

The bartender pointed to the open register, and the crooks — who attempted to mask their faces with hooded sweatshirts — snatched $600 and two bottles of the water of life before fleeing the bar.

Obama drama

More details have emerged about the spontaneous street celebration following Sen. Barack Obama’s historic presidential victory in the wee hours on Nov. 5.

According to police, the election party turned sour at around 2:30 am, when officers attempted to disperse a “disorderly group” of revelers near the corner of Bedford Avenue and North Seventh Street, cops said.

When cops tried to scatter the group, a 30-year-old disobeyed the order and tried to grab an officer’s baton, police said.

While the suspect and the cop struggled, the officer’s partner entered the scuffle, but he was knocked to the ground and fractured his thumb, cops said.

The suspect was collared. The good news, of course, is that the election results stand.

Pusher man

Cops nabbed a would-be thief who forced his way into a Norman Avenue apartment on Nov. 6 in an attempt to steal a woman’s cellphone.

The thug pushed his way into the apartment at around 9:10 pm while the victim was trying to shut the door.

“Give me your phone,” the punk demanded before shoving the 35-year-old victim against the wall.

The woman shrieked and the thug fled from the apartment, which is at the corner of Leonard Street, but cops nabbed a 23-year-old suspect later that night as he entered the G-train station at Norman and Manhattan avenues.

Bizarre bank robber

An odd offender tried to coerce Manhattan Avenue bank employees into robbing their boss on Nov. 6.

The strange — and luckily unarmed — suspect confronted a bank worker at around 12:50 pm and ordered the employee to pull off the heist.

“This is a robbery — I need you to get up and go to the teller now and get cash,” he said.

When the employee refused, the thug tried to convince another bank worker to get cash from the teller — but this employee also would not pull off the job.

Before fleeing, the would-be robber then threatened to destroy the bank, which is between Noble and Calyer streets

“I’ll be back and I’m gonna blow this place up,” he said. He did not return.

Cleaned out

Crooks broke into a Norman Avenue Laundromat on Nov. 3 and snatched a laptop, a wallet, credit cards, car keys and a checkbook.

The thieves grabbed the goods from the business office between noon and 2:20 pm, before escaping from the Laundromat, which is at the corner of Jewel Street.

The crooks didn’t damage the office door, leading cops to believe that they might have used a credit card to open to lock.

Golden rule

A crook snatched more than $1,000 of gold jewelry from a Dupont Street apartment on Nov. 3.

The thief got into the apartment between 1 pm and 2 pm, and ransacked the apartment before breaking open a locked bedroom dresser to grab three gold chains, four rings, and four watches, before escaping from the building, which is between McGuinness Boulevard and Manhattan Avenue.

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