Will Mommy divorce Daddy?

for The Brooklyn Paper

The road to 40 has been paved with disillusionment. If you had asked me three years ago, I would have said I would be married to the same man forever. But people, places and things have come along to make me question what I might formerly have said was fact. I love my husband dearly, still find him smart, funny and communicative. But as forever looms closer, the seed of doubt has been planted and I cannot deny it.

Among the things we disagree upon is that The Big G is a yeller, going from zero to 60 in far faster than a minute. His yelling is often sparked by something the kids have done that he worries might upset me and wants to head off at the pass. His heart is in the right place, but his yelling at the kids undermines whatever sensitivity he was trying to show towards me. Lately, though, I have barely bothered to get angry, knowing as I do, that after 18 years together, we are who we are, for better or for worse. We can make small changes to ourselves but, really, we all remain roughly the same.

Our natural reactions to things, our understanding of them, are difficult, if not impossible, to change.

The other night, some small thing erupted, I can’t even remember what it was. It could have been anything from the boys wrestling as pre-sexual adolescents are wont to do, or not putting their pajamas on as soon as they were told as adult control-freaks (myself included) are wont to demand. The Big G began the high-volume hijinks, and I took the children’s side, though I know I am not supposed to. I think I tried to hide my annoyance from the kids, but I am loud even when muttering under my breath something along the lines of, “That’s it…”

The muttered statement came from a very real place. I have begun recently, sadly, to wonder if it might not serve both of us to spend some time apart, to see what we might become independently. The thought has crept in slowly but surely, and I have shed many tears over even the possibility of breaking apart what I have always seen as a perfect union.

Clearly, my children are aware that these feelings have arisen. They are like dogs, using all their senses to figure things out. Following the incident, the house calm once again, my little Oscar was sitting reading in my bed as I put things away.

He looked up from his book out of nowhere and put it to me straight: “Do you want to divorce Daddy?”

It was not unlike being asked how babies are made. It caught me off guard.

Sure, I’ve had nagging doubts, but are they so obvious that my son has picked up on them? And divorce? Could I do that? Would I want one? I don’t, but sometimes what you want isn’t what you need. Does anybody really want a divorce? My mother, long separated from my father, tells me she certainly didn’t, even though she is the one who actually left. How do I explain to my son that yes, sometimes I do feel like divorcing his Dad? How do I tell him that the thought has entered my mind a lot as a solution to fixing my post-40 ennui — but then again, so have a lot of thoughts, like getting a dog, having a drink (OK, a third) or moving the family to a new house.

Funny, though, I am certainly more comfortable being straightforward about these other options than I am about divorce. We can talk about getting a dog as a family, look at them and discuss the pros and cons. My kids will often try to convince me to have a third baby for them to play with. As for drinking, we do it without hiding, explaining to the kids that it’s something adults do, hopefully with moderation, though they have certainly seen us do otherwise. And I talk often of moving, openly coveting houses with porches as we walk down the tree-lined streets of Park Slope. Eli, my elder, stability-seeking son, will always say definitively, “We’re NOT moving!”

Why is it then, that the possibility of divorce is such a taboo topic? It pains me not to be able to talk about it. I pride myself on telling my kids whole truths rather than half-truths, engaging with them on whatever topic they feel comfortable to raise. But the nuance on divorce is challenging. It is something, if not handled perfectly, that can absolutely rip families asunder. Kids naturally fear divorce, like death, and our first instinct is to protect them from thinking it could ever happen. But it could. It might.

I didn’t know at all what to say to Oscar in the moment. So I settled on hedging. “No,” I told him. “I don’t want to...” It’s true, but can I promise that it will never happen? No, just like we’d told the kids a tornado would never touch down in Park Slope. Life is not definitive.

He was not satisfied with the answer, and it is something that will likely have to be addressed more concretely in the near future. To let such questions fester, to not offer children the complete true picture about things they are picking up on, is a fast way to shutting them down. Our role as parents is figuring what they know and helping them make sense of it. That’s hard when you often don’t understand it yourself.

The lessons I have learned from watching other couples is that you have to be flexible in your thinking. No one single way is the right way.

I was once asked what the biggest effect was on a child whose parents were very amicably divorced, I thought long and hard and then answered: “He’s going to realize that one life-long marriage is not the only way to do it.” This boy was forced to see the truth firsthand: we have choices.

But the bad news is that these choices are not easy. It is up to me to be honest with my kids, to guide them, fearlessly, through whatever happens.

Reader Feedback

R. from Bklyn. says:
This is a very common situation and unfortunately some think the way is to run away from it instead of taking it head on. If you believe in God and you see that all the things that are happening in the world today are supposed to be happening as prophesies are coming true right before your eyes and as unpleasant as it may seem to you it is only God that can and will clean it up as man has failed and will never succeed. So only God is able to fix your situation and you must turn to him for the happiness of your children and the mending of your marriage. I have a wonderful book on how to have a happy family life and it is yours free if you want it? Please take this into consideration as it helped me fix my life. Sincerely R.
Oct. 12, 2010, 12:33 pm
K from Brooklyn says:
This article is an example of the oversharing endemic in our culture. You live in this borough as do your husband and children who many people who read the Brooklyn Paper know personally. I am sorry that you are willing to publish about such private moments. Perhaps you do not realize the hurt you inflict on your family. Get some therapy and stop using your kids and long suffering husband as the scapegoat for your issues.
Oct. 12, 2010, 1:41 pm
shocked from brooklyn says:
What a sad situation. I only hope you showed this article to your husband before you published it. Did you?
Oct. 12, 2010, 2:36 pm
Howard from Park Slope says:
First, I agree with K & Shocked and hope that this issue was discussed with your husband first. However, if you both believe your marraige is heading for divorce, please consider the emotional and financial ramifications for the entire family and don't make a hasty decision. The one question I always ask people in a terminating relationship, do you believe that this person "watches your back". If yes, there is a basis to continue together. If not, then be civil and amicable to each other. Good luck to both of you.
Oct. 12, 2010, 3:47 pm
Bob Scott from Bklyn Heights says:
You lost me with your lead and not sure I'll read further. Why would you NOT expect to be married to the same man forever? Ughhhh! Certainly, things happen and couples break up. No sin there (well, maybe, but that's for another newspaper). But NO ONE — NO ONE — should enter a marriage EXPECTING that it will not last. Ughhhh again!
Oct. 12, 2010, 5:29 pm
Respect Dads from Park Slope says:
Your husband has a right to privacy. He always comes off like the boob dad in Berenstein Bears. But he supports all of you? Or perhaps I am assuming incorrectly that you cannot be supporting yourself by writing for the Brooklyn Paper? Ladies who lunch complain too much when their husbands rationally ask for some discipline in the house.
Oct. 12, 2010, 5:55 pm
SingleAgain from Greenpoint says:
If it's really true that "I love my husband dearly, still find him smart, funny and communicative" then divorce should be out of the question.
Do you expect to find someone better? Would living with your kids alone be better than having someone with those qualities around, whom you also love?
Oct. 12, 2010, 10 pm
maggie from park slope says:
ok, who thought smartmom shared tmi? this is nauseating.
Oct. 13, 2010, 12:46 pm
D from Park Slope says:
As a husband, parent, and Park Slope resident who, sadly, knows all of the parties involved, I feel a genuine sense of sympathy for "The Big G" and the two kids who deserve better than having their family's personal and private moments callously used in this self-aggrandizing article masquerading as parenting advice. There certainly is no "fearless parenting" in using your seven-year-old's fear of family dissolution for ego-driven self-promotion.
Oct. 13, 2010, 2:46 pm
Karen Young from Bed-Stuy says:
Sounds to me like you need to talk to your husband DIRECTLY about the damage he is doing to the kids. You should insist on counseling. If he can't or won't modify his behavior, then you should think about whether it's best for you AND THE KIDS to stay with him or to go. You need to be honest with the kids as well. You said you know this, but then you lied to your child in response to a direct question.

Your post seems to make it all about you. To me it's really all about the kids you brought into this world and whether you can fulfill your obligation as a parent to provide them a safe space.

BTW men like this can change - I saw it on Supernanny....
Oct. 13, 2010, 2:53 pm
R from Park Slope says:
Here's my problem with this...it's like I stumbled upon your journal and read a very irrational and emotional entry that you wrote after a half-drunk argument with your husband. I feel a little bit like I just violated your privacy because that is exactly where irrational thoughts and feelings belong...in a private place, not on the internet where it can now be read forever. Hope you realize that no matter how much you ever want to take back any of these words, they are now on the web, and that's permanent (unlike your marriage, according to you).
What is truly sad is that I don't see any signs of honest introspection--if your aim is to improve the quality of life for all 4 of you, the place to begin is the only place you have any real control over: yourself.
The REAL parent in your home seems to be your Oscar (I can't tell you how much I cringed when I realized you actually included your child's name...or was that an alias?).
Finally, your claim is that the biggest problem in your marriage is the volume of your husband's voice!? Really!? He's not cheating on you or beating you, he's not even emotionally/verbally abusing you. He doesn't have a gambling or drug addiction. He just yells sometimes. This is the basis for your entire argument, and is an unfathomably ridiculous reason to seriously contemplate ending a family. Not ending a marriage, but ending a family.
Sure, your mother is happy despite being divorced, but call her back and ask her if she would have had a better life (would be having a better life) if her marriage had worked out. Good luck with that.
Personally, I think you wrote the article to get a rise out of people. To get attention. It worked. You've gotten attention, but it's the same negative attention I'm sure your son gets when he does something he knows is wrong. Bad mommy.
Oct. 14, 2010, 9:30 pm
Anon from Park Slope says:
This disgusts me. For many reasons. I am a Park Slope resident, I know this family, and share this community with the Thompson's. This is the same thing that Ms. Thompson did when introducing her "boyfriend" around the school yard, while her husband was unaware. There is NO tact in how she writes, behaves in her life, and embarasses her family. It is all about Stephanie at all times, at all costs. Even an "insight" into human reaction/action becomes about her own issues.

This is a woman in the deep throws of a mid-life crisis who is looking for a platform. Her children and husband are being thrown to the wolves in the process. Many people in the Community have voiced outrage at her behavior, and it is far beyond this article. Most of what she has exhibited, in all aspects of her recent life, is an example of poor behavior and bad judgement. Have an affair; do it in private. Have a crisis: get help. Don't drag everyone with you.

In addition, more than one of us have seen "The Big S" yell at her children (and grown ups alike), in a public setting, from "0-60," far outracing her husband.

And by the way... SHAME on The Brooklyn Paper for enabling a person who is in deep need of a therapists' couch, refuses to believe it, and masks it as "parental advice."
Oct. 15, 2010, 12:22 am
M from Park Slope says:
Such a troubling and provocative topic clearly requires more thoughtfulness than the writer brings to bear here. I'm not entirely against such truthfulness (with spousal permission) but the writer of such a piece needs above all to be able to look deeply at herself, flaws and all. Provocation alone is not enough -- if you're going to risk this level of emotional exposure you actually need to SAY something meaningful about the issue.
Oct. 15, 2010, 12:40 am
Ph.D. from NYC says:
As a psychoologist/psychoanalyst affiliated with a major university in New York, I am appalled at the fact that Ms. Thompson would name her husband and young children in this article, rather than write it in the third person, which would represent her point of view as well, and would avoid exposing her children to the kind of scrutiny and teasing that could well be damaging to their development and growth. I'm also shocked that the editorial board of The Brooklyn Paper would let this go down. By the way, I'm writing this letter anonymously so that I don't expose MY family to the kind of public commentary that my views may elicit, and that should be directed to me and not to them. Perhaps Ms. Thompson could do the same. A minor note: if Ms Thopmson cannot edit her own work for spelling and punctuation, perhaps the editors should.
Oct. 15, 2010, 6:54 pm
Ph.D. from NYC says:
Since I know that the editors will probably not pick up on my typo (psychoologist instead of psychologist), I'll do a little late editing!
Oct. 15, 2010, 6:59 pm
Brooklynite says:
This column disgusted me. Do you realize how much pain you may cause your husband and children in writing this?

Here's an idea: swallow your ego, and quit the column. Smartmom was bad enough. Really. What good can come from writing this?
Oct. 15, 2010, 7:46 pm
X from Park Slope says:

Self obsessed pond life!

If only you were smart enough to actually be embarrased
Oct. 15, 2010, 11:22 pm
B from park slope says:
The question is really, "Should Daddy divorce mommy?". Shame on you for this poor attempt to make your husband look like the bad guy here! You forget most of your readers know you and are sadly well acquainted with your antics. Between your cheating (which you never even had the good grace to hide!), your blatant and outrageous flirtation, to your inappropriate dress and of course, your questionable parenting, "G" deserves a medal for having put up with you for so long. You are in serious need of therapy.
Oct. 16, 2010, 11:17 am
B from Park Slope says:
There are is a great deal of sadness in this story:
- First, the title 'Will Mommy divorce Daddy? - this is a power trip from the writer I believe. Whilst many children may be concerned about the possibility of their parents divorcing and this would have been a good topic on dealing with the potential issues surrounding the fears of children from a parenting perspective. The title clearly demonstrates 'Who' has the control in the relationship?
- Secondly, labelling her husband as a 'Yeller'. Who hasn't yelled at their children? It's like saying "You always do this or you never do that". A permanent label is ridiculous. My partner would be overjoyed if I 'Yelled', when I'm unhappy with a situation I go quiet.
- thirdly, whilst she has a good writing style, did her husband approve of this story? This impacts the whole family......
- fourthly, I am hoping that she has not used her children's real names?
- finally, it sounds as though "The Big G" should be encouraging/ demanding that they go to counselling for the sake of the family.

One of the sadest stories I have ever read.
Oct. 17, 2010, 12:20 am
j from brooklyn says:
Who among us has not been subject to the unpredictable or unexpected? Life is not a fixed or controlled plot, although some of us may think so. I admire the bravery of being honest to reveal the struggles of every day life over the cowardliness of attempting to make neatly tied up packages out of toxic sewage. Our children feel it all whether we discuss it or not. Discussing it or at least trying to helps them bring words and make sense of the sometimes confusing and heart wrenching dynamics that plague our relationships at times. This reminds me of that old saying "he without sin cast the first stone". Is it better, as one reader suggests, to keep your affair a secret? Is it ok as long as it is secret? Really! In my opinion the things which lurk in the dark have a much greater potential of destroying than the most terrible things we choose to bring to the light. At least then there is still hope for transformation.
As far as running to the defense of Mr. Thompson, it's really an insulting assumption on your part that you think so little of him as to view him as a helpless victim in this. He is a grown man who is capable of making his own decisions. I think it's clear that the author has not concealed anything from him and they together are willing to try and get through their tribulations. How many of us can say that? For those of you that have weighed in, have you no skeletons in your closet?
Come on!
I'm choosing to give the author the benefit of the doubt here. Maybe she got a little caught up in the emotional aspect of the situation but her point is not lost. I feel her pain during this difficult time and appreciate the honesty.
Sometimes the road is not perfect but with truth you can make it through.
Oct. 17, 2010, 2:24 pm
M from Park Slope says:
Yes, we are all well-acquainted with Stephanie's antics. Her years as chair of the library committee, her organizing of 2nd grade swim, her volunteering at virtually every school event. These actions have been shameful and inappropriate enough, but to break the Park Slope code of silence on anything personal is despicable. For shame!
Oct. 18, 2010, 9:59 am
Z from park slope says:
What's hard to take about this "truthful" "honest" piece is that the writer complains about her husband's yelling, while neglecting to mention what too many know - that she cheated on him for a long time. So my answer is - no, mommy should not divorce daddy. If it were my husband, he'd be yelling too, if not leaving. It is only "truth" if you own up to your own actions, and the writer here doesn't. It's sad for the family, as she has now opened the door to comments about her affair that will live forever on the internet. What kind of mom does that to her kids?
Oct. 18, 2010, 10:10 am
M from Park Slope says:
It is interesting that the same people who are so critical of Stephanie for exposing her family to the mudslingers are the ones slinging the mud. Your concern for her husband and children is admirable, especially when you are contributing to the slander.
Oct. 18, 2010, 10:45 am
Q from Park Slope says:
Is "j" actually Stephanie herself? The writing style (not to mention the staunch belief that you can do anything you want, no matter how damaging, as long as you're honest about it) is hauntingly familiar. And "M" seems to be more intimately acquainted with Stephanie's volunteerism resume than most readers would be. Remember, honesty is the best policy .. .
Oct. 18, 2010, 11:15 am
Brooklynite from Brooklyn says:
I agree with M from Park Slope that people who are posting nasty accusations here really are doing as much if not more damage than Stephanie's initial article. Not that I agree with Stephanie's own airing of her family's dirty laundry (honesty within the family is one thing, broadcasting your family's private issues is quite another), but this public shaming is even more disgusting. Glad I don't live in Park Slope.
Oct. 18, 2010, 12:12 pm
P from Park Slope says:
I think J from Brooklyn has very valid points about "He who casts the first stone" and skeletons' in closets. It may be true that many of the commenters, even the most mud slinging, have their own skeleton's and things they are struggling with.

When you put things out there, for all the world to see, they stick and have reprecusions. I'm quite certain that people have this in mind when having an affair and keeping it to oneself (as J had said was so awful), or discussing a hot (and personal) topic like Ms. Thompson did for all to read. This is why they choose to keep it to themsleves. Perhaps J finds this intolerable, perhaps he/she is informed by their own personal history; I do not know, but sometimes it is equally as brave to think how it does (or will) affect the entire family by putting it out there. Certainly it saves the person from embarassment and public scrutiny, which can be seen as selfish, but it does the same for the entire family (especially if there are children), as well. I'm not judging either way, but can see the validity of both scenerios, and HAVE seen friends go through each.

I took some of the comments, and lashing out so venomously, with a grain of salt. It seems that perhaps people have been upset by Ms. Thompson's behavior in the past, and chose this moment as an opportunity to get it off their chest. If nothing else, the writer has clearly evoked response and stirred up dialogue.

I am a Park Slope resident, and have seen Ms. Thompson help in many ways at her local school and give generously of her time. I think, certainly, that our behavior, opinions, actions, etc. can define us, but I also think that there are many sides to things and people, and nothing is black and white. Especially in a marriage. Ms. Thompson has opened the door to some scrutiny, and with that comes opinion. I think this would be true whether you lived in Park Slope or anywhere else.

I wish them well.
Oct. 18, 2010, 1:48 pm
Rebecca from Park Slope says:
The point of this article is that some subjects - some very important subjects - are taboo in our culture and that reality impacts how we have honest discussions with children (who are always picking up on the stuff anyway). I think it's too bad that the comments have devolved into catty remarks about the author's personal life. Yes, Stephanie did invite us into the conversation by writing this piece, but I wish instead that the comments focused on the meat of this article: Life is strange and weird and has many twists and turns... why are some things like divorce (or sex or death) shunned from everyday discourse? How can we be honest with ourselves, each other, and our children about all these heavy topics as we navigate the ups and downs of life? THAT is an interesting conversation.
Oct. 18, 2010, 3:17 pm
Jen from Park Slope says:
@Rebecca - Unfortunately, there really was not very much "meat" to the article in terms of exploration of any of those issues; nor, apparently, was there any exploration of those issues in the Thompson household on the evening in question. Ms. Thompson failed to discuss the issue with her children at all, even when her little boy got up the courage to broach the subject himself. There's really not much new to the general idea that we should honestly discuss the important issues that impact our families' lives, and the article fails to provide any real insights or to offer any ideas on how we might approach such difficult subjects constructively with our children. Thus the article winds up seeming more like a pointless and potentially damaging stunt than a parenting column or an attempt to create a forum for further discussion. If the entire point was to explore how best to talk about these things, the detailed description of the ugly scene in the Thompson home and the musings on Ms. Thompson's post-40 ennui really seem gratuitous and unnecessarily sensationalist, and obviously distracted the readers from any underlying message about communication the author had hoped to convey. Not to mention destroying any credibility the author might have tried to claim in terms of her expertise in parenting or relationships in general. Having said that, it is indeed a shame that the response was so unseemly and unkind.
Oct. 18, 2010, 5:34 pm
L from Brooklyn says:
M, no-one is questioning whether she helps out at the local school. That really has no bearing on this article. The issue is that she presented a very one sided view of what is clearly a troubled relationship. So to entitle an article "Will mommy divorce daddy?" and then go on to elaborate that the reason for said divorce would be her husbands yelling, is simply ridiculous. If indeed Ms T has cheated, and behaves in the ways outlined by those who know her, then she should think long and hard about her own faults. A balanced view of the issues that might lead to a divorce might not have been met by such a vitriolic response but its obvious that many were offended by her presenting herself as blameless. I don't believe the article needed any supporting personal detail at all. Anyone who is married knows the issues that can lead a couple down the path of divorce. The article should have been focused on how to address such difficult issues with children.
Ms T and her husband would do well to have an honest, frank discussion about all the problems and seek professional help at this difficult time.
Oct. 19, 2010, 8:32 am
A says:
I also feel compelled to say that it isnt mudslinging or gossip to refer to the author's affair, which she chose to be extremely open about for a long time. Her affair, like her musings on divorce here, are simply a fact that she herself chose to publicize for reasons known only to herself.
Oct. 19, 2010, 11:07 am
pd from PS says:

What pride you must feel. Such an ability to evoke such passionate responses from such a cross-section of fellow slopers.

I just feel sorry for your children as they have their family life played out for the world to see. If you thought for one second that you were doing the right thing for them, then the next call should be to the office of children and family services.

http://www.ocfs.state.ny.us/main/

After that you could perhaps consider

http://www.nysdivorcelawyer.net/

But most importantly

http://www.nypsychiatrist.com/
Oct. 19, 2010, 1:05 pm
AnonMom from Park Slope says:
Perhaps if she was so open about her affair, her husband was okay with it too. Maybe they had an open marriage? Who are we to judge?
Oct. 19, 2010, 4:07 pm
Essbee from Chicago says:
"Will Mommy Divorce Daddy?"
Will daddy put his foot in mommy's ass is more like it. I am stunned at the level of vulgar self absorbtion you have exhibited in this piece.
You really, really, really need to STFU.
And a shout out to "Big G" - handle your business brother.
Oct. 20, 2010, 10:39 am
psdad from park slope says:
to say that she was cheating is quite an accusation. proof? no? then why say it? just because a woman has the gall to have a male friend and (gasp) walk around with him, does not an affair make. Jealousy and spitefulness are horrible traits. It saddens me to see this public attack on an odd, but decent, human being.
Oct. 20, 2010, 11:34 am
lechacal from park slope says:
psdad, unless everyone is lying it sounds like the author herself was pretty open about her affair. Her article is nauseatingly self-centered even if the affair stories aren't true. I hope her husband gets a really good divorce settlement and a much hotter second wife.
Oct. 20, 2010, 12:49 pm
Jeremy from Park Slope says:
I think its clear that the piece is misguided but the comments are vitriolic to say the least. Personally I like people who are nuts but what I dont like is people who are mean. As a PS 107 parent (and its clear to me at least that most of this hate is coming from other 107 parents hiding behind fake names (my name is for real BTW)) I knew there were a lot of Breeder fruitcakes at our school but I didnt realize how many of you were so unkind.
Oct. 20, 2010, 1:43 pm
elly from Ex-Park Slope says:
@lechacal
Nice priorities, bud. "..a good divorce settlement and a much hotter second wife " -- What a sickening comment and rebuke. As if that matters above emotions, family, and should be all that counts. Especially as a reward for putting up with a situation that everyone involved created in some way.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:12 pm
Erin from Park Slope says:
What a bunch of self-righteous folks we are!

Comments like these make me ashamed to live in Park Slope.

If this story had been published in the Modern Love section of The New York Times everyone here would think it's brilliant and be discussing snippets over lattes.

Stephanie, this piece was thoughtful and well-written. Ignore the trolls, keep your spirits up, and carry on. We'll be reading (and enjoying).
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:15 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Jeremy, these people are from PS 107? I don't know them at all. Or maybe I do but not by name.

Elly: If it's true that this chick has been sleeping around (I have absolutely no idea, don't even know her, just blindly following the mob and going by what people are saying here), and if her husband hasn't been, her husband deserved a good divorce settlement and a much hotter second wife for putting up with that. Not gonna apologize for saying that. And - again if those two things are true - she shouldn't be here gabbing on and on about how he raises his voice, she should be here saying "gosh, I like to sleep with other dudes, maybe my husband deserves a better wife."
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:20 pm
Charisma from Park Slope says:
If you're serious about what you wrote, you should consider talking to someone.
Not a shrink necessarily, but someone to sort out your EGO and CHILDHOOD issues.
Look into Landmark Forum, it will help you and your family.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:20 pm
Jen from Park Slope says:
@Erin - The article is neither thoughtful nor well-written, let alone brilliant. It was reckless, seemingly pointless, and ill-advised, and because it was so poorly written, its supposed message about communicating with one's children -- if there was one -- was utterly indescipherable. However, that does not mean that the author deserves to be pilloried in this way. I do agree with you on one point -- the comments make me ashamed to live in Park Slope. Feels more like Salem, Mass, circa 1692.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:23 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Anyone want to give me an over / under on when this thread will prove Godwin's Law?
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:25 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
What a load of crap!!!!!
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:29 pm
elly from Ex-Park Slope says:
@lechacal

I guess I don't understand why a much hotter wife makes up for anything? Perhaps a good divorce settlement if any of what has lit up the comments is true. But we don't even know (at least I don't) more than a tiny tip of the iceberg here. We don't know their lifestyle; we don't know if he hasn't been doing his own running around either. I guess I just don't see how a guy, about who we know nothing, deserves a "much hotter second wife" simply because you're floating on the mob's accusations. It just makes no sense in any way.

Say for all intents and purposes she did cheat, and it wasn't what they had agreed on in their relationship. This automatically wipes away all other problems in their relationship? So he's the martyr? Just because someone--the wife--does one thing wrong, doesn't mean they automatically get a free pass and are thus good and are owed rewards. Especially if that reward is a physically "hotter" wife.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:32 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
@elly

Much hotter wife = wicked good revenge.

And yeah, if she was sleeping around and that wasn't the arrangement I don't really care what he was doing, she should totally get the raw end of the deal as long as he wasn't physically abusive or something like that. Oh waaaaahhhhh he was emotionally distant so I had to start ——ing other men.... if I had a dollar for every time I've heard that.... well I wouldn't have any dollars, but I've seen that on TV and that's good enough for me.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:35 pm
davinbedstuy from Guess says:
I suspect this woman has made most of this crap up, taking liberties with real facts, as most writers striving for attention do.

A lot of phrases point to a strained need to be overly creative: "The muttered statement came from a very real place." as a perfect example.

And wtf with the reference to pre-sexual children wrestling.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:42 pm
Daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
This person, lechacal, makes some good points. She should get the raw end of the deal. Is this only coming out now after NYS has adopted no-fault divorce?

Also, the whining about her husband being emotionally distant is just too, too, well, park slope.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:44 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
@daveinbed stuy. What is your problem with park slope? Oh mr fancy pants bed stuy person comes over here to judge us park slopers.

And the way you talk about pre-sexual wrestling I bet 50 bucks you're gay.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:48 pm
Daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Did you have a difficult childhood, lechacal? I bet you grew up in a cabin in farmland somewhere. You had an awful childhood and probably ran off to the circus.

Then what happened, you realized you were wasting your life so you apparently found a job and now live in Park slope. You're probably an accountant or a lawyer and you and your wife spend hours at the food coop so you don't have to talk to each other.

I din't bring up the pre-sxual wrestling, she did. I just noted that it was creepy. And yes I am gay but I'm sure I'm not interested in anyone like you.
Oct. 20, 2010, 3:54 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
A$$hole.
Oct. 20, 2010, 4 pm
Daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Nazi.
Oct. 20, 2010, 4:06 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
All right daveinbedstuy, I'm audi 5000 - just scored some playoff tix. See you next time, a$$hole.

Salem witch trials. Sheesh. When't the last time some of these people got laid?

Later.
Oct. 20, 2010, 4:06 pm
daveinbedstuy from GUess says:
Have fun at the game. Not sure if i can do lunch on Friday.
Oct. 20, 2010, 4:10 pm
FellowParent from The slope says:
Stephanies article is about parenting.

To be that "open" to the world (I cant use "honest" because only she knows what information/detail is omitted) you'd want to ensure your kids had the resilience of a fort.
Oct. 20, 2010, 10:29 pm
anon from parkslope says:
What audacity to criticize anyone while you yourselves engage in such appalling behavior. For those of you who have followed her every move, maybe you have a serious jealousy issue?
For those of you claim she has been open about an affair, well you must suffer from severe insincerity! I'm sure I've seen you laughing it up with her in the schoolyard or even sipping some wine at her home. Shame on you!
Oh and for the record I live in the neighborhood too and know all too well that many have their secrets (or at least you think it's secret).
Oct. 20, 2010, 10:53 pm
lechacal from pork slope says:
This keeps getting better and better. A bunch of neighbors who have been watching who everyone has been ——ing and are subtly threatening to talk. The plot thickens. Hey, it's the Internet people, don't just subtly threaten, hide behind an anonymous login and name some names! Who's been ——ing whom and where and when and why? (keep the how to yourself unless it's funny). Maybe someone should start the who's ——ing whom in park slope blog. That would rule. At PS 107 this morning I kept looking around wondering who all of these people are. Anyone want to take bets as to whether the following individuals have posted comments above?

1. The chick who wrote the article.

2. The dude she's allegedly banging on the side.

3. The alleged cuckold.

4. Nosy neighbors who are jealous they aren't getting a piece of the action.
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:03 am
Daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
I would bet that the biggest complainers here aren't getting any. There's a lot of uptightness in PS and lack of sex is probably one of the maine reasons.

Second would be a lack of quality Toro in Brooklyn Japanese restaurants.
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:51 am
lechacal from pork slap says:
Yeah, you're probably on to something there Dave. I think 99% of the stuff people say on park slope parents can be attributed to lack of dick and bad sushi.
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:57 am
Daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Gays would never resort to this sort of attention-seeking, low class form of airing their dirty laundry in public.
Oct. 21, 2010, 11:30 am
lechacal from park slope says:
Huh. Well I guess Liza Minelli's husbands are good examples of gays going through divorce, though I can't remember whether they kept it classy.
Oct. 21, 2010, 12:17 pm
daveinbestuy from Guess says:
I think our work is done here, lechacal.
Oct. 21, 2010, 12:49 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Yeah. I stopped getting uppity responses a while ago. I guess it's time to drift off to some other corner of the brooklyn blogosphere (I'm judging myself for using that stupid word btw) to get some tofu humping stroller pushing co-sleeping coop members worked up about something. Actually wait, I've got it! Here let's see if the old standard works:

Sarah Palin is really hot and she would be a much better president than that socialist Barack Obama.
Oct. 21, 2010, 12:55 pm
arkady from Park Slope says:
Aside from the support for Sarah Palin, I am in complete accord w/ Le Chacal! OMG! WTF?
Oct. 21, 2010, 1:39 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Kirsten davis is really hot and she would be a much better governor than that socialist Cuomo.
Oct. 21, 2010, 1:44 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Don't try to make a living on judging women's looks dibs. Kirsten Davis has really big boobs but she's not hot. And her boobs are fake. But she did run a successful hookery, which is why I intend to vote for her.

Some dweeb has been standing at the turnstyle at the 7th Ave F stop in the morning droning on and on about voting for Cuomo. Tomorrow I'm going to inform him that I'm voting for the chick with the big boobs.
Oct. 21, 2010, 1:50 pm
jeffers from P-LG says:
What an engaging premise!

One awaits further developments with mounting excitement:

Will Mommy Get Custody?
Will Mommy Have to Kidnap Little Oscar?
Will Mommy Get a Six Figure Advance?
Will Daddy Eat Sh*t And Die?
Oct. 21, 2010, 1:53 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
jeffers...come join us in the Open thread on brownstoner.com I suspect you have valuable input.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:06 pm
Biff Champion from Brooklyn Heights says:
Mr. daveinbedstuy and Mr. lechacal, I find your statements here disrespectful and insensitive. Why don't you both go find some blog to go to where you can spew your nonsense all day long?
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:30 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Mr Biffchampion: Oh, coming to the author's defense I see. You've been stuffing her like a Christmas goose, haven't you? Admit it!
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:36 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Mr. Champion: Isn't it time for the nurse to take you out in the wheelchair for your afternoon stroll?
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:36 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
3 to 1 odds that jeffers is the dude she's been banging on the side.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:39 pm
Biff Champion from Brooklyn Heights says:
Mr. daveinbedstuy, I don't know why you are filled with such hostility. Is it because this story mayhaps hits too close to home and you fear your wife may also be having similar doubts about your relationship?
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:42 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
If she's bangin some old guy in brooklyn Heights you can be sure whe's just a money hungry social climber.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:43 pm
Biff Champion from Brooklyn Heights says:
Mr. lechacal, you can joke about this all you want, but lost emotions are almost always impossible to recover. It is not like a lost sweater, that can easily be found or replaced.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:45 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Mr. Champion, adjust the bifocals......I admitted above after lechacal's astute conjecture, that i was gay. We really don't care that much if our partners cheat on each other. it's part of the culture and why the gay Pride Parade horrifies otherwise astute politicians who should be governor.

Maybe this woman has done both Cuomo and paladino.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:45 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Going from park slope to brooklyn heights is social climbing? I thought that was retirement.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:48 pm
Biff Champion from Brooklyn Heights says:
I'm done trying to engage in a civil discussion. You two neanderthals should stop harrassing people on the internet and take up a hobby. Maybe something you can do in the privacy of your own home without bothering others. Try claymation or Asian sculpture collecting.
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:50 pm
arkady from Park Slope says:
Mr. Champion, I really take exception to what you're saying. Dibs has said he's gay & you are simply not respecting that yet you sympathize w/ the mother (!) who is ready to upset her entire household & possibly scar her children for life & solely for selfish reasons. Where are your values?
Oct. 21, 2010, 2:59 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Mr. Arkady...I suspect that this family is already permanently scarred from life with this witch.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:04 pm
Pete from ParkSlopeFarWest says:
This poor woman is trying her best to raise children is this difficult day and age and all you offer is ridicule.
Why are Park Slope people so competitive and judgmental?
She obviously is bi-polar and I'm surprised that the psychooligist didn't mention that yesterday.
She needs a support group. Perhaps lechacal would like to lead it.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:04 pm
pitbull from park slope says:
lol

*rob*
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:04 pm
arkady from Park Slope says:
Pete - I guess if that's "her best" I sympathize w/ her & hope her poor, put-upon husband ties her shoelaces for her.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:07 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Pete...how far west is west? Sometimes you just gotta call BoCoCa, BoCoCa and suck it up!!!!!

You are probably right about the bi-polar. Are you in a medical profession yourself?
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:07 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Mr. Arkady....I'm guessing you're from the "southern parts" oof Park Slope because people in the heart of Park Slope have to do better than "her best." If she can't make it there, she can make it somewhere else and maybe ought to move to manhattan like that douchebag from a few weeks ago.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:10 pm
arkady from Park Slope says:
Mr. Dibs, For an avowed gay guy (make that 'person'), you show remarkably little sensitivity. Are you just aspiring to be gay?
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:15 pm
Mr. B from Brooklyn says:
Hey...all of you get back over there, NOW!!!!!!
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:17 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
i didn't take any vows, mr. Arkady.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:20 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
hahahahaha we just got busted.

OK a parting note: everyone keep your eyes open for talented hotties for this chick's husband. Let's get this guy laid asap.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:21 pm
pete from ParkSlopeFarWest says:
dave,
You can do thorough examinations without being in medical profession. But I am sure you know that already.
You mark yourself as some recent transplant from Albania using terms like BoCoCa.

arkady is a blatant stereotyper. perhaps he would share his bigoted thoughts on other minority groups.
like baldheaded men.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:22 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Wait, Pete is bald? Oh my God, what a total loser. Bald guys are so pathetic.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:25 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
lechacal...I hear there are a lot of hot women over there>>>> on that other blog to fix this poor excuse for a husband up with.

But what would I know. STFU Mr. Arkady.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:27 pm
Sarah Palin from Wasilla says:
Did someone say hot woman?

[wink]
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:28 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
OK, so I did a little investigative reporting, and it turns out all of these people who know each other apparently live in the Ansonia housing projects. I've always wondered what goes on in there. I've heard it's like a little tight knit community. I guess it's just one of those tight knit communities that plays games like pass the herpes and judge your neighbor.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:29 pm
arkady from Park Slope says:
Mr. Dibs, I guess you're from Guess since no neighborhood would want to identify w/ you.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:34 pm
Pete from ParkSlopeFar West says:
that answers it. All housing project people.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:37 pm
Jimmy McMillan from Brooklyn says:
Sarah, You Go Girl!!!!

THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:38 pm
daveinbedstuy from Guess says:
Mr. Arkady...have you got even a half a brain in that liberal Democrat head of yours???

I'm daveinbedstuy. Figured it out yet??????

I guess if someone wanted to marry a shoe, you'd be the one. Jimmy, find someone to marry her.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:41 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
This sort of thing would never happen if I were Governor. I would simply provide the husband with a suitable outlet for his "anger" (read sexual frustration, since his wife is cheating on him).
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:44 pm
Arkady from Park Slope says:
That's Jimmy Choo to you, Mr. Dibs. And I figure your name means you're someone's beds toy - I allowed for your poor spelling.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:45 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Kristin...did your escort business include male escorts. i may have been a customer of yours.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:45 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
And I would let him look at my boobs, too.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:45 pm
Arkady from Park Slope says:
Who has taken over my name? ArKaDy - Republican Kristin Davis.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:47 pm
Sarah Palin from Wasilla says:
My boobs are bigger than hers.

[wink]
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:49 pm
Joe from Plumber says:
"My boobs are bigger than hers."
Rewrite! I'm a bigger boob than her.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:50 pm
daveinbedstuy from bed Stuy (duh) says:
Kristin...all he wants is some b*&tch that he can yell at who won't go on a blog and rant about it to friends & neighbors. I suspect you have a girl like that in your stable.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:51 pm
The What from Clinton Hill says:
I'm the guy Ms. Thompson has been having an affair with.

*someday this war is gonna end*
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:54 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
The majority of my freelance employees do not have time to blog, let alone comment on blogs. I am only posting this as a public service and example of how I will improve the lives of sexually frustrated New Yorkers when I am elected governor and because I can rest my boobs on the desk while I type and it helps my backache.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:58 pm
Jaccuse from Paris says:
IMPOSTER!!!

There were no obscenities in that sentence, and The What lives in Asshat Hill.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:59 pm
daveinbedstuy from bed stuy (duh) says:
Hey What....you men are all alike...shove an I-Beam up my ass and then go off with some PS woman who could never give you what I could.
Oct. 21, 2010, 3:59 pm
Krisitn Davis from Manhattan says:
In truth most PS 107 fathers prefer to be the yellee rather than the yeller, although they do appreciate boobs.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:04 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
Typo in my own name above caused by boob slippage onto keyboard.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:06 pm
daveinbedstuy from bed stuy (duh) says:
Monsier jaccuse...shouldn't you be rioting somewhere at a refinery or blocking a petrol station???????

C'est domage about the later retirement. Welcome to la realite.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:06 pm
Ashlee Dupree from New Jersey says:
Kristin, you still owe me a thousand bux for that job with the creepy guy who wore socks.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:07 pm
noname from noplace says:
didn't it occur to you, jungle animal, that the husband may also be an adulterer?
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:08 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
Oh, please, Ashlee - you're lucky he kept his socks on or he would have given you hoof and mouth disease. And you still owe me for the good half of your boob job - I believe it was the left one I paid for.

And realite n'est pas francais.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:11 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
He's probably really a disgusting homosexual. No wonder she has to cheat on him. He probably asks her to wear a Speedo to bed and tape her boobs down.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:13 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Carl, you and I ought to get a drink together sometime. Those are fetishes that hetero men have!!!!!!

I'm still voting for you though.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:22 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
There is nothing to be proud of in being a dysfunctional Park Slope parent. That is not how G-d created us. I don't want children brainwashed into thinking that living in Park Slope is an equally valid and successful option. It isn't.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:30 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
ROFL at frankie paladino @ 4:30 pm
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:33 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
I believe you said earlier that you were a homosexual Mr. davinbedstuy. I do not drink with homosexuals. Besides, Ms. Davis has promised Mr. McMillan that he can caress her boobs with his gloves on while murmuring RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH and I can watch.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:35 pm
Andrew Cuomo from manhattan says:
Carl, who was the babe you were playing hide the sausage with????
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:36 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
Mr. Cuomo, it was your mom. She works for me.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:38 pm
Charles Barron from East New York says:
The tragedy of this situation is not that a dissatisfied, potentially adulterous female may leave her emasculated, sexually-frustrated husband and traumatize their children for life, or that a bunch of wackos from elsewhere have hijacked this thread, or even that there are some true nut (and boob) jobs in this governor's race, but that because of all this, NO ONE IS PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO ME. I USED TO BE A BLACK PANTHER!
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:39 pm
Matilda Cuomo from Queens says:
Kristin you know that's not my specialty. I tend to prefer the moulignans.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:43 pm
An Asian Trannie Hooker from Buffalo, NY says:
Mr Paladino: I have some bad news. I'm not a woman, and that wasn't a strap-on.
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:52 pm
Kristin Davis from Manhattan says:
Maybe you could help me clean up Albany, Trannie. I am in a unique position to understand the economics of sex and we could certainly use your kind of help in clearing out the "dead wood."
Oct. 21, 2010, 4:59 pm
Client No. 9 from Manhattan says:
Ashlee, you asked me to keep my socks on!
Oct. 21, 2010, 5 pm
Harry Haller from East New York says:
(huffing and puffing)
...so this is where everyone is hiding!

(pauses to catch breath)
just wanted to say hi. ;o)
Oct. 21, 2010, 5 pm
lechacal from pork slip says:
";o)"

Ha! I know exactly who you are, mr arch conservative man.

ooooh so it turns out there is a PTA meeting tonight. Maybe I'll go and try to figure out who the heck this woman is.
Oct. 21, 2010, 5:06 pm
Charles Barron from East New York says:
Harry, I hope I can at least count on your vote (if you're not too preoccupied with boobs, gloves, muttonchop whiskers, and RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH). I used to be a Black Panther!
Oct. 21, 2010, 5:06 pm
Dick Blumenthal from CT says:
Hey Jimmy, can I borrow one of your bronze stars from the Vietnam War????
Oct. 21, 2010, 6:08 pm
mopar from Brooklyn says:
Didn't you people see Squid & the Whale? I guess that mom wasn't bipolar.
Oct. 21, 2010, 6:40 pm
Jimmy McMillan from Flatbush says:
If I give you one of my stars, Dick, you'll have to take some of the agent Orange I inhaled as well that makes me need to wear gloves all the time and RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH.
Oct. 21, 2010, 6:43 pm
dh from billyburg says:
sounds like an episode of melrose place except undoubtedly more boring and frumpy
Oct. 21, 2010, 7:22 pm
Hall Monitor from P. Slope says:
Mr. Champion has written thoughtful and eloquent comment here. He is president of something-or-other I heard, where there is another romantic situation brewing. A certain Ms. MM of Brooklyn recently vetoed a popular vote to entertain The What, who is mentioned above. She had enough clout with her editor to exclude The What from his place on a certain blog. Now he is quite angry and bashing the quite innocent editor. There may be jealousies. involved etc.

The What seems partial to MM. They may meet, fall in love and get married. She is smart, and The What is not a yes-man. He is smart and she cannot push him around. Who is this mystery man, the What? Perhaps he is an editor at GQ magazine.

Would love last or would it end in divorce? Relationships are difficult and there are no easy answers. Take it slow, thoughtfully and prayerfully.
Oct. 21, 2010, 7:48 pm
Chiller from Cobble Hill says:
"Why don't you both go find some blog to go to where you can spew your nonsense all day long?"

Snort!
Oct. 21, 2010, 8 pm
twinsinparkslope from Park Slope says:
I read the article and found the writer's take on her own crisis very endearing. I would say many of us Park Slope mothers have a lot to cope with. Many people don't understand how difficult it is to raise children nowadays especially in a place like Park Slope with an unsupportive husband. The fact that this man actually "yells" at his children is unbelievable to me. Haven't we moved on from being "those" kind of parents where we are reduced to yelling at our children to do the things we ask of them? what's next - spanking?

To the posters above who "hijacked" the comments section: Grow Up!
Oct. 21, 2010, 8:24 pm
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
twins, Thank you for that heartfelt response to this story of marriage and heartbreak in Park Slope. Really, this could be any of us. I just think Stephanie is so strong and brave to open herself up to this hideous criticism, as evidenced here by these terrible people hijacking these comments. It's so disappointing that we can't be allowed to have a serious conversation expressing real thoughts and feelings about the difficulty of marriage and raising children in the inner city.
Oct. 21, 2010, 8:57 pm
ridiculous from absurd says:
I wonder if Steph has learned anything from any of the comments. Put the best face on her column & assume she wanted constructive criticism - I look forward to her next installment.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:07 pm
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Hmmmm...it all seems like TMI to me. But perhaps I am, in all my glittery goodness, too sensitive for the room. And who are these interlopers who are having fun in this commenting section? A wilding pack of loons from another blog, no doubt. A blog on which someone of my highly respectable character would never be caught. Now if you'll all excuse me, I'm off to find this Stephanie person and toss some glitter on her. Glitter fixes everything.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:09 pm
Ginni from Washington says:
I just hope she'll apologize to the wives of the husbands she's dallied with.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:09 pm
Dr. Zizmor from UES says:
Lavinia, you clearly have an acute case of irony if you consider Park Slope the "inner city." They have antibiotics for that.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:11 pm
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
Dr. Zizmor, I recognize that you, being from the UES, may not understand that Park Slope is not Ohio. Have you actually ever been to Park Slope?
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:17 pm
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Why go to Park Slope? You can visit it on the internet. I've heard that's just as good as actually going.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:31 pm
Miss Kitty from Park Slope says:
Do not get a divorce. They cause more problems than they solve. Work out the kinks you describe. You will not be able "to guide your children through divorce", fearlessly or otherwise. Let your husband get help with his yelling and determine its cause(s).

These are deep life issues. Do you have any church or is there any such guidance and/or support available to you?

If you divorce, he will find someone else quickly and your money will be gone, money that the children will need for their quality of life. You would likely remain unmarried for a long time or forever. Look at the prospects out there. Dismal to few. There are few people of character left.

Look for the hidden treasures in what you already possess. Make a life together for now and your future with grandchildren. A divorce could deeply scar your children for life. I know some psychologists say some baloney about quality over quantity, and other stupid stuff, but your children will be hurt so deeply they may barely survive, take drugs and otherwise self-destruct. Do you want that on top of what you already have?

And when he remarries, you will have a strange woman who will be in your children's lives. Are you ready to cope with that? Do you think yelling is bad? Well it is, but there are worse things.

Use your maturity, think of others rather than your own happiness, which is elusive anyway. The world is ready to almost turn upside-down economically anyway and in all the ways we have known it. Stick together for what lies ahead and be a strong unit.

A wise an experienced counselor once told me that the only time a marriage cannot be fixed is if one person has no character. Determine your situation.

One more thing, these other physical attractions will turn out to be cardboard in the long run, blah and unfulfilling. Don't give up what you have for a few stupid hormones. Don't give up on your life without a fight.

sign me: experience in Park Slope.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:36 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
"twinsinparkslope from Park Slope says: Haven't we moved on from being "those" kind of parents where we are reduced to yelling at our children to do the things we ask of them? what's next - spanking?"

Aahahhahha hhahahaha ahahahhahah aaaaaahhhhh hahaha ha ha ah haha HAHAHAHA ha

[wipes eyes]

Ohmygod. hahahahahah no ——ing way. hahaha hHAHAHAAHAAHHA no way.

OK, there are two possibilities here, and only two:

1. You are childless.

2. Your kids run you, not vice versa.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:43 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Miss Kitty at 9:36 gets the award for most thoughtful and inspiring post of the day.
Oct. 21, 2010, 9:59 pm
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
::handing Lechacal some glittery kleenex::

Wipe your eyes with these, dear.

:-)
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:08 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Oh, thanks s.... Um, glitter goddess. ;)
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:12 pm
Miss Kitty from Park Slope says:
Umm, thanks lechacal :)

Please pass me a kleenex for your kind words.
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:18 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Is there any one of the authors many supporters here who is going to step up and say she WASN'T screwing some other dude or that the husband WAS screwing some other chick? Because unless one of those things is true, she doesn't get to write a self-centered article that drags her family's dirty laundry into public without getting publicly shamed like this. If you screw around at least have the good sense to realize you're a shithead and focus on apologizing for that instead of writing articles about how your husband yells too much.

And just remember big G, hotter second wife is awesome revenge.
Oct. 21, 2010, 10:19 pm
Good Lord! says:
Wotta bunch o' —— ——es!
Oct. 21, 2010, 11:22 pm
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
lechacal from park slope, I'm concerned that you take the subject of corporal punishment and verbal abuse so lightly. God bless you and your family.

Are you a religious man? Perhaps prayer would help you.
Oct. 21, 2010, 11:33 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Lavinia: What? I can't hear you. I was just yelling at my kids while I was trying to make breakfast, get them dressed, do dishes, and get ready for work at the same time. I assume you don't have kids. Either that or your spouse does all of the work while you pop mood levelers and do yoga.
Oct. 22, 2010, 7:04 am
lechacal from park slope says:
Or maybe you have one kid and you helicopter over the poor thing all the time and think that by quietly using reason in every tiny little detail of the kid's life you're doing him a big favor, which you're not. Try handling three kids sometime. If you're too thin-skinned to give your kids a good yelling when they need it your poor kid (if any) is going to get eaten alive when he grows up.
Oct. 22, 2010, 7:22 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
twins...how do you discipline YOUR children??? If they don't get yelled at and/or spanked ocassionally they're likely to grow up as sociopaths. Have you already witnessed any of the tell-tale signs from your children??? For starters I bet they've already begun swearing at you, and you sit there and take it like the nambu pamby PS mother you are.
Oct. 22, 2010, 7:47 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
"Many people don't understand how difficult it is to raise children nowadays especially in a place like Park Slope with an unsupportive husband."

Why is it more difficult in PS than anywhere else?

Define unsuppportive husband.
Oct. 22, 2010, 7:49 am
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
lechacal from park slope, Being a parent of 3 children can be very stressful. I have 4 myself, and I know they can be trying at times. You need to know that there is another way to cope with the stress aside from verbally abusing your poor children. Your children are likely already scarred. Verbal abuse and spanking will never be part of how I raise my innocent children. Perhaps your children are spoiled little hellions, which seems pretty typical over in Park Slope, and now I understand why. They're acting out due to the stress, poor children. This only serves to remind me of just how very difficult it is to raise normal children in the inner city. I will pray for you and your family.
Oct. 22, 2010, 8:22 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
I find most of these comments about how difficult it is to raise children in Park Slope and "the inner city" pedantic at best and rather condescending.

I'm sure Mr. lecahacal is not "verbally abusing" his children. there's a big difference between yelling at them and verbal abuse.

I've seen others spank and yell at their kids over here in bed Stuy. From what I see these children behave much more civilly than what seem to be "spoiled brats" in Park Slope.

**I pray for you and your family**
Oct. 22, 2010, 8:29 am
The What from Asshat Hill says:
I was beaten as a child. Now I take it out on Ms. Thompson during our trysts. She seems to enjoy it.

**Someday this war is gonna end**
Oct. 22, 2010, 8:31 am
Young4Old from Silverdaddies says:
Spank me, daddy, spank me hard. I've been a very bad boy.
Oct. 22, 2010, 8:33 am
arkady from Park Slope says:
Lech - Were you able to i.d. the perp at the PTA meeting? If so, what did you say to her - or did you take her somewhere for a quickie?
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:16 am
lechacal from park slope says:
Lavinia, I'm totally on to you. I'll yell at you on another blog at some point today. :P

Arkady: No, I still have absolutely no idea what this person looks like. I've joined a nice big lynch mob, and here I am standing here holding my torch and pitchfork and whatnot, and I don't even know what address to go to.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:22 am
Randolph from Brooklyn says:
Young4Old, do you have an email address? We should hang out.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:23 am
dh from billyburg says:
this article (and comments) pretty much sum up why brooklyn children nowadays are a bunch of snot nosed entitled —— heads.

you parents suck. you're raising a bunch of marshmallows
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:26 am
lechacal from park slope says:
That may be your opinion Mr. dh from billyburg, but in rebuttal I will state that the Black Keys suck.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:30 am
Dan Auerbach from Citizen of the World says:
Mr. Lech, you have no idea what the eff you're talking about. You must listen to techno and only have like 10 songs on your ipod.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:33 am
lechacal from park slope says:
Mr. Dan Auerbach: 100% of the people who listen to your music are dirty hipsters who live in Williamsburg.

And I may have only 10 songs on my ipod but I don't listen to them anyway.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:34 am
Storm Fields from TV says:
I think it's about 75%.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:35 am
dh from billyburg says:
leave the keys out of this!

seriously though - it's not cool to spank or yell at your kids? do you know what's gonna happen when your child is a teenager and is taking the train to their fancy charter high school in manhattan? they're gonna get jumped by REAL NYC kids and get their —— tooken. fo reals.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:36 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Mr dh from Billyburg, I suspect you don't actually have any kids; no one in Billyburg does, so what gives you the right to dish out advice on how to raise them????

Who is Don Auerbach???
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:40 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Besides, Mr. dh, there are no REAL NYC kids in Manhattan. When's the last time you left that hellhole of billyburg and ventured to the UES or UWS and saw how real people live????
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:42 am
dh from billyburg says:
actually, dibs - i watch the wonder years and lots of shows based in the 70s - and it seems like parents back then were feared. i want my kid to be like kevin arnold.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:42 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
I used to lust after the Rifleman's son when I was young. I think he had an exemplary father (ex-porn star).
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:43 am
Ishtar from Reality says:
Lavinia, get over yourself. I bet you drink yourself blind after you put your crotch fruit to bed.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:46 am
lechacal from park slope says:
Parenting is like international relations. Only the possibility of violence can create order. Example: nuke Japan once, and they're on good behavior for, what, going on 60 years now? You can tell when you walk into a house where the parents are afraid to discipline their kids. The kids walk around barking out orders, the parents meekly comply, and dad is usually wearing a skirt with a nice matching purse.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:47 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Mr. dh, Happy Days was also a model for how to raise children. Ritchie Cunningham was the model child because of his mother and father.

Fonzie had no indication that there were any parental units and as such, was a troublemaker.

Potsy and Ralph were just wimps.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:48 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Mr. lechacal, I agree with you wholeheartedly (no homo).

I've recently seen a lot of marves (man scarves) come out of the closet (so to speak, no homo) now that it's gotten cooler. Could these men EVER raise a child properly? I think not.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:50 am
lechacal from park slope says:
"Lavinia, get over yourself. I bet you drink yourself blind after you put your crotch fruit to bed."

Not necessarily correlated, ishtar. I do too and I yell at my kids all the time.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:52 am
dh from billyburg says:
they should really make a reality show involving Park Slope moms.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:55 am
TwinsinParkSlope from Park Slope says:
DaveinBedstuy & Lechacal - clearly you aren't parents!

I certainly don't want to stifle my kids creativity when they are acting up - that's when a child can clearly express themselves.

And yes raising children in Park Slope is VERY difficult - between all the school choices and which Connecticut Muffin is nearest to their school where I can park my Double Wide um Stroller - We here have it tough here
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:03 am
Ishtar from Reality says:
Well, lech, it's not like you're shaming other folks parenting skills. It's always the critic who has the worst kids.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:05 am
BHS from Park Slope says:
It is clear that Ms. Thompson has come to a turning point in her life where she has realized that merely rearing the next generation of super beings who will save the planet is not enough and that she needs to seek personal fulfullment beyond the everyday random thrills generated by an adulterous affaire (or five - that I personally know of from overhearing the comments at my co-op shift). A divorce is inevitable and I wish her all good things - and I've got dibs (no, not you) on selling their house!
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:09 am
dh from billyburg says:
"personal fulfullment"

i see what you did there - awesome
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:16 am
Carl Paladino from Upstate says:
I just want to say that all you people down in New York City, and Park slope in particular, are nothing but a bunch of smug elitists.

The sanctity of marriage between a man and a woman is something that should never be violated.

You gays got it easy not being able to marry. Why wish for that????
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:16 am
lechacal from park slope says:
OK, for reelz now - BH are you a legitimate commenter or just one of us clowns? Those are some pretty serious allegations. I just want to make sure the mob is well informed.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:17 am
trustafarian from williamsburg says:
so is this chick hot?
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:22 am
Essbee from Chicago says:
No - but bangable.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:36 am
A Yorkshireman from England says:
These spoiled park slope children are lucky. When I was a kid we lived in a paper bag in a septic tank. We used to have to get up at six in the morning, clean the paper bag, eat a crust of stale bread, go to work down at the mill, fourteen hours a day, week-in week-out, for sixpence a week, and when we got home our Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:38 am
Another Yorkshireman from England says:
Luxury. When I was a kid we used to live in a lake. We used to have to get out of the lake at six o'clock in the morning, clean the lake, eat a handful of gravel, work twenty hour day at the mill for tuppence a month, come home, and Dad would thrash us to sleep with a broken bottle, if we were lucky!
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:41 am
Third Yorkshireman from England says:
Well, of course, we had it tough. We used to 'ave to get up out of shoebox at twelve o'clock at night and lick the road clean with our tongue. We had two bits of cold gravel, worked twenty-four hours a day at mill for sixpence every four years, and when we got home our Dad would slice us in two with a bread knife.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:42 am
Fourth Yorkshireman from England says:
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us and dance about on our graves singing Hallelujah.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:42 am
Lou Dobbs from INS says:
Why do we let all these Englishmen and other scum into this country???? WHY?????
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:43 am
Village Idiot from 12th century England says:
I think this woman is a witch. She's obviiously turned her husband into a newt.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:53 am
BHS from Park Slope says:
Apparently the reason Ms. Thompson sees so much action is that the majority of Park Slope moms are actually too exhausted from serving our nation's next generation of savants and leaders (and too afraid of getting pregnant yet again and where will we put another baby in this rathole two bedroom floor-through that we can't move out of because it's in PS 321 and RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH??) to actually allow their husbands to lay one pasty little finger on their sagging stretch-marked hide (and their nipples are too sore because even though Desdemona is 3 she's still nursing and those teet HURT). Ms. Thompson, however, because her husband actually takes some responsibility as a father and yells at his progeny when it misbehaves, has all the energy in the world to spend on all those frustrated Park Slope dads. This is why in the end the moms will all vote for Jimmy McMillan (that and the lingering glove and muttonchop whisker fetish thing) and the dads will all vote for Kristin Davis. Cuomo will win in any case, because the semi-normal citizens who don't live in Park Slope will vote for him. Carl Paladino and that Green Party guy will become homosexual lovers and everyone will live happily ever after and I'm still selling her house and you're not.
Oct. 22, 2010, 10:55 am
lechacal from park slope says:
OK, seriously though BHS, and this is all kidding aside. You said some pretty serious stuff in your post earlier today. Is it true or not? It's all well and good to hijack a thread and have fun, but I think everyone should all be very, very careful about expanding the affair rumor unless you're pretty goddamn sure it's true. The article is self-centered and reeks of self-promotion, but this is still someone's life here. A lot of different people were saying the affair thing earlier, which I suppose gave it an air of truth, but I still don't know this person at all, and I suspect my fellow thread hijackers don't either. The only thing more gross than someone sleeping around and then blaming her husband's yelling for a divorce is someone falsely accusing someone of sleeping around while they hide behind an anonymous internet name. So - true or not? Deadly serious here.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11 am
Charles Barron from East New York says:
What about me BHS???? I USED TO BE A BLACK PANTHER!!! Ain't you overpriveleged white people scared of nothing these days? Vote for me or I will riot your food co-op!
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:03 am
BHS from Park Slope says:
I know exactly who you are Mr. Chacal and I know why you're so deeply interested in this item. Yes, your mistress may in fact have been cheating on you as well. I'm sorry, but there it is. If you showed up more regularly for your co-op shift you would know all the details. And when I sell her house she will try to find a two bedroom rental near to PS 107 but RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:06 am
lechacal from park slope says:
OK jackass. So you're a jokester like the rest of us.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:30 am
Hall monitor from hell says:
Name calling!!!! Name calling!!!! I won't tolerate that.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:33 am
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
Mr. Ishtar, I sense that you are unhappy with my comments. Perhaps prayer would help you, as well as Mr. lechacal from park slop.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:44 am
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Lavinia, I told you and everyone else before that *glitter* fixes everything. Put the Bible down and start sprinkling. You'll see.

:-)
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:45 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Lavinia, you don't have a prayer.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:48 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Glitter Goddess, did you sprinkle a little on Ginni Thomas??? Is that why she extended the olive branch???
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:49 am
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Daveinbedstuy, no, I did not waste my precious glitter on Ginny. Anyone who asks for an apology rather than simply beating someone about the neck and shoulders until they scream "I'm your b-tch for life" does not deserve glitter. Harumph.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:51 am
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Glitter Goddess, you have a very enlightened approach that probably works well. I suspect you learned it from pia & Hari.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:54 am
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
Mr. daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy, I'm quite sure you could use a little prayer in your life, too. We have a prayer group that meets 3 times a week here, would you care to join us? Your wife is welcome, also.
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:54 am
Nothing from nothing leaves nothing says:
Glitter Goddess, are you ripping off Gold Star For Trying? Glitter alone does not fix everything -- It must be a glittery foam gold star!!!
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:55 am
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Lavinia, my glitter encrusted crystal ball tells me that Mr. Daveinbedstuy would not be praying for the same things as you. A word keeps appearing in the ball. Rentboys? Wait...there's more...dancing brown rentboys? It's cloudy now and I can't be sure...
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:56 am
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Nothing, who is the 'Gold Star For Trying' of which you speak? Everyone knows the Glitter Goddess of Greenwood Heights. I am a legend. I am an enigma. I am the walrus, coo coo cachoo...oh wait...Getting confused...
Oct. 22, 2010, 11:58 am
Nothing from nothing leaves nothing says:
GG - Well, confused or not, you deserve a gold star!!! At least you're trying.
Oct. 22, 2010, Noon
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Why thank you! For that you get glitter...

::sprinkling glitter on Mr. Nothing::
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:02 pm
Nothing from nothing leaves nothing says:
I can fly! I can FLY!
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:02 pm
Mrs. Been-there from Dumbo says:
The What has secretly married Montrose M. This is blasphemy that he could be having an affair with Mrs. Thompson.
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:03 pm
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
See! I told you glitter fixes everything!
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:06 pm
daveinbedstuy from bed Stuy (duh) says:
I saw Montrose Morris cruising Fulton park last week. Didn't look like she had the What in mind!!!!!!
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:08 pm
Glitter Goddess from Greenwood Heights says:
Montrose Morris would never have anything to do with the What. She's far too classy to even consider it. Speak no further of such abominations!
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:12 pm
Mrs. Been-there from Dumbo says:
These men are all alike, Mrs. Thompson.
Mr. daveinbedstuy apparently has a wife somewhere.
Then he says he is gay. Can't people just make up their minds, or CHANGE? I want him.
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:13 pm
Daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
It'll be a cold day in hell when I travel as far as Dumbo for sex, especially with a woman who flaunts herself so obviously on the internet.
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:21 pm
Oscat Thompson from Park Slope says:
Waaaahhhh! Leave my Mommy and Daddy alone!!!! Waaaahhhh!!!!!!!!!!!
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:25 pm
Mrs. Has-been from Dumbo Broken Heartland says:
See how mean they are, Mrs. Thompson? (Dave at 12:21) Big tears are falling down my face. And this was NOT and invitation for s*x, Mr. Big Shot. How dare you try to take it to that level. Oh, the cruelty of it all. ...she screams and yells. Besides I would not want to go to your ghetto.
Now I am broken-hearted, FOREVER. I know, I know, people have said it here for a few days. I should not reveal so much of myself publicly. I know when to give up Mr. Dave big-shot. You are too much man for me.
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:37 pm
Lavinia from BoCoCa says:
Daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy, Does this mean that you're not totally averse to sex with your wife at this point? That gives me great joy and hope to hear it. We need to protect and support our inner city families.

Oscat, There, there, don't cry. Why aren't you in school? Mommy and Daddy both love you very much. They've just temporarily lost their minds posting this kind of private family business on the internet.
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:38 pm
Oscar Thompson from Park Slope says:
Mommy says I can't go to school anymore because everyone is being so mean to her and Daddy who are just trying to work things out in their lives and thought they could count on the love and support of the caring Park Slope community to help them. Now Mommy just sits and cries and looks at her phone and none of her friends come to visit any more either. I really liked that Mr. Chacal guy but Mommy says he won't be coming by ever and we'll also probably get throwed out of the co-op so I won't be able to beat up the other stupidheads in the child care room for calling my Mommy a garden implement I'm not supposed to say and why would anyone call anyone's Mommy a garden implement anyway. Waaahhhh!! I wish Daddy were here to yell at me. What's a homosexual anyway and where is this Bed-Stuy place? I like bed!
Oct. 22, 2010, 12:52 pm
R. from Bklyn. says:
This is exactly what is wrong with our society and the problems that a disbelief in God brings, just as I was saying in my first (and ONLY thus far) comment on this thread. I, too, was engaged in unwholesome and nonbiblical behavior and untrusting of my partner, but a simple book changed my life and I can give a free copy to anyone who wants one. These things that are happening on this site and these people who feel a need to act out in multiple forms and names have all been prophesied before. I wish that God's love comes and heals you all as well as this poor woman and her family.
Oct. 22, 2010, 1:07 pm
Miss Kitty from Park Slope says:
"This boy was forced to see the truth firsthand: we have choices."

This is too important to leave to some new-agey psycho-babble about "choices". The only choice you have is to make the right choice for you and everyone in your family. Get wise counsel if you can. Get wisdom and get understanding. The long-range effects for all of you can be catastrophic. Wrong "choices" are a-dime-dozen. Want to live a sub-standard life? That is the easiest path to take, and the hardest to follow for the rest of your life.
Oct. 22, 2010, 1:27 pm
Guidance Counselor from Oscar's school says:
Oscar...no need to worry. Most of you fellow schoolmates' mothers are whores in one way or another. A "homosexual" is a person who leads a dysfunctional lifestyle although, it would seem that, from here on out, your family will be the poster family for dysfunctional.

Prayers will not help.
Oct. 22, 2010, 1:40 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
This is exactly the kind of thinking that has lead our society into its current socialistic downward spiral. Imagine - a public school guidance counselor, paid with our tax dollars, telling a poor confused student that prayers will not help! As governor, not only would I abolish the MTA but I would also break the grip of the UFT on our schools and ensure that prayer was restored to every classroom on a daily basis while homosexuals wearing Speedos were forced to grind themselves against each other at the back of the room.
Oct. 22, 2010, 1:53 pm
Oscar Thompson from Park Slope says:
No, you don't understand, they never called my mother a whore (I know what that is, my great-grandmother had to sell her body for money to get away from the Communists in Russia), they called her a garden implement and that is a VERY BAD WORD (my nanny told me so). And I guess everyone in Park Slope is a homosexual then. Can I see the bed's sty now?
Oct. 22, 2010, 1:57 pm
Dave's Mexican bf from Canarsie says:
Mr Paladino...have you ever tried a burrito???
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:04 pm
Chris Christie from NJ says:
Carl, let me know if I can give you some pointers on how to handle the teahers union.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:06 pm
Mrs. Been-there from Rehab in Dumbo says:
What? Dave is still seeing his wife? I take back all of the nice things I said about Dave. I just went to re-hab and am now recovered from my broken heart, well almost, these things take time.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:12 pm
Catherine the Great from Russia says:
I've tried a burro, but never a burrito.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:13 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
What's a burrito? Is it some kind of rice and beansy thing? I only eat Italian food and everyone knows that there are no Mexicans in Canarsie.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:13 pm
Dave's Mexican bf from Canarsie says:
Mr. Paladino...you must remember the Canarsie of old, filled with nice Italian Americans. well, it's ours now.

And too bad about that "Italian curse." Those Italian sausages could never hold a candle to a big beefy burrito. Also, we work harder than you people.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:17 pm
Dave's Mexican bf from Canarsie says:
Mrs. Been-there...you are VERY confused. I'm still with my wife but Dave's seeing me.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:19 pm
Zakhar Zotov from St Petersburg says:
Will you stop it with all the bestiality talk about my mistress? She collapsed while in the bathroom. I (and several helpers, she was a BIG woman) removed her to her bed. There were no animals involved!
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:20 pm
Catherine the Great's Horse from St Petersburg says:
Yeah she was a big lady all right. It was a lot easier riding her than vice versa.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:22 pm
Carl Paladino from Canarsie says:
I know for a fact that Canarsie was ceded to the moulignans years ago while we got to keep Howard Beach. No way would they allow beaners in. And my sausage will beat anyone's burry-toe any day! Plus, we've got cannoli for dessert!
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:26 pm
Mrs. Been-there from Rehab in Dumbo says:
to dave's mex bf: does this mean that you are available? talk about the plot thickening. is everyone unfaithful these days? back to rehab for me. my favorite movie stars are here.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:32 pm
Kenneth Pinyan from Gig Harbor says:
Catherine the Great never did anything like that.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:32 pm
Dave's Mexican bf from Canarsie says:
Mrs. Been-there...i have a really hot chica at home so I don't need you (and more trouble). You couldn't handle the hot chili that runs through my veins. Believe it or not, Dave's a really nice guy, has a hot bod and doesn't suffer from the "Italian curse."

BTW, you Italians left the place a mess when you left. We're here to gentrify.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:36 pm
Grigoriy Rasputin from St Petersburg says:
Kenneth, were you there? Were you? That horse was all over her like white on rice. It was unreal. I don't recall anyone from Gig Harbor in the audience.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:38 pm
Catherine the Great's Horse from St Petersburg says:
Yo Greg - high five.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:39 pm
Dave's Chinese bf from SoHo says:
Grigoriy....Dave's all over me like white on rice.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:42 pm
Mike Bloomberg from The Capital of the World says:
Hey, you russkies......take the Nets and begone. We've really got enough of you guys in brighton beach already.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:45 pm
Mrs. Been from Dumbo says:
Mr. mex bf: you better treat Dave right and not fool around. Are you gentrifying Canarsie?
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:47 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
Mexican bf you need to get your facts straight, Canarsie was beautiful when it was populated by Italians (except for the occasional whitefish and the smell at low tide). We left long ago. Any mess you're encountering now is not us.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:49 pm
Dave's Mexican bf from Canarsie says:
Yes, Mrs. Been. But it's not hard for us mexicans since the Italians left everything painted red, white and green already!!!!!
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:50 pm
11217 from The Most Magical Place on Earth says:
Quote
- And I talk often of moving, openly coveting houses with porches as we walk down the tree-lined streets of Park Slope.

This is the best part of the story
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:52 pm
Gov. Paterson from Albany says:
Carl...are you going to paint the state capital building red, white and green? Will Wednesday be "spaghetti day" throughout the state????
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:54 pm
Mikhail Prokhorov from Moscow says:
Mischa that's sure not what you and Marty were saying while you took turns with my пенис while I was fisting Brucechick. I'm sorry we didn't get LeBron - you gotta admit you were mighty ugly in that video. Maybe if you'd shown him the one we made in th ekitchen at gracie Mansion he'd have been more interested.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:55 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
Sorry, Dave, the capitol's been painted red white and green since six months ago - not that you'd be able to tell or anything. And I think every day should be spaghetti day, provided that it's with my Nonna's sauce! Again, Mexican bf, get your eyes checked - more like red green and black down there from what I hear.
Oct. 22, 2010, 2:59 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Carl, that last comment was uncalled for.
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:07 pm
Eliot Spitzer from Manhattan says:
"Gov. Paterson from Albany says: Carl...are you going to paint the state capital building red, white and green?"

Like you'll notice???
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:09 pm
Carl Paladino from Buffalo says:
Sorry, you dysfunctional homosexual. And aren't red while and green also the colors of the Mexican flag? So what's your bf's problem?
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:12 pm
Mrs. Been better from Recovered in Dumbo says:
to mex. bf- Dave would not go for those colors and I don't think he especially prefers Italians. We Dumboans did not arrive yesterday. Can't you just leave the green and make everything else orange and yellow or something? Don't you have HGTV over there? And don't you know that Dave has a Chinese bf? (duh)
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:14 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
This new Carl impersonator is rather thick, and I don't mean where it counts. The joke about the red, white & green couldn't have been more obvious.

I suspect it's randolph!!!!
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:17 pm
Ashlee Dupree from New jJersey says:
You sock-wearing creep! Give me the thousand bucks you owe me! I got a payment due on one of my boob jobs!
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:17 pm
Smartmom from OTBKB says:
See what happens when you throw me out? This never happened when I was writing this column.
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:22 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Maybe that's becasue I never bothered to read your column.
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:40 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
Survey says: Spelling errors in snarky posts reduce zing by 30 percent.
Oct. 22, 2010, 3:42 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Not to worry, Mr. chacal...these people are just too stupid to notice and I don't mean only the russkies.
Oct. 22, 2010, 4:08 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Not to worry, Mr. chacal...these people are just too stupid to notice and I don't mean only the russkies.
Oct. 22, 2010, 4:08 pm
daveinbedstuy from Bed Stuy (duh) says:
Survey Says: Double posting in snarky posts reduces zing by 40%
Oct. 22, 2010, 4:12 pm
Mr. Thonpson's Lawyer from Manhattan says:
Survey Says: Blabbing about your personal life on the Internet reduces alimony payments by 80%.
Oct. 22, 2010, 5:12 pm
Mrs. Mexican BF from Canarsie says:
I have a marital story for the Brooklyn Paper.
Oct. 22, 2010, 9:27 pm
B from Brooklyn says:
You know, reading all this, I used to feel sorry for "daddy" but now I can't help but feel that they deserve each other. To "Big G " i have one thing to say, "grow a pair" or accept that you will be forever an object of ridicule. If you are prepared to sit back and allow yourself to be treated like dirt underfoot, don't expect support/sympathy from those around you. She is making a fool out of you and if that is ok with you, you are in as great a need of the therapist's couch as she is. I worry for your child.
Oct. 23, 2010, 10:32 pm
J from Park slope says:
Correct. G - you have the right to grow some balls and refuse to be silent!
Oct. 23, 2010, 11:29 pm
lechacal from park slope says:
So I finally figured out who these people are. Just a couple of random normal looking middle aged humans. They were at the PS 107 fall festival yesterday with their kids. As we were walking down the street behind them I mentioned this article to my wife and made the following observation: It's impossible to really know who's right and wrong without knowing the people involved. But it is OK to judge whatever she chooses to put out in public like this. If she shares just a few details about her life in an article like this, we're all entitled to come to our own conclusions about her based on those details, and if she makes herself sound like a self-promoting narcissistic then it's up to her to either start writing fiction or to share whatever details would allow us to come to a different conclusion if we really knew her. She chose to write it in her own name, about her own family, which most people clearly think is a colossal error of judgment in this situation. Once she does that we all get to judge what she has put out there in the public domain, and it's not incumbent upon us to get to know her better before judging her.
Oct. 24, 2010, 8:50 am
lechacal from park slope says:
On a related note, and apropos not really knowing these people or what the story is, Big G: if she really was screwing around on you and you weren't screwing around on her, how on God's green Earth are you not taking this woman to the cleaners right now??? Good for you for yelling at your kids. Maybe you should yell at your wife for a change. Please don't tell me she convinced you that somehow it's your fault because you weren't supportive enough, or weren't emotionally there for her, or some other weak-minded bullshit excuse that only a woman with a tenuous grasp on logic but a firm grasp on her husband's balls could ever propose with a straight face. If she ——ed around and you didn't, it's her fault, she's wrong, you're right, take her to the ——ing cleaners, and if you can't grow a pair and do that then I don't feel sorry for you at all.
Oct. 24, 2010, 9:01 am
A Grandma from Brooklyn says:
Stephanie honey, if you feel okay about what you wrote, then just don't pay any attention to these people here.
Oct. 24, 2010, 6:32 pm
Habeasdoofus from Carroll Gardens says:
WTF? Are you people sure you live in Park Slope? Are you sure it's not Peyton F---ing Place?

I'm kind of surprised there's enough time for all this handwringing and Victorian loud-enough-to-be-overheard whispers when you no doubt have been busy ripping William Holden's shirt and chasing him out of town for being too "untoward" as pertains to Kim Novak. Or training for the Bourgeoislympics.

I actually think this "salon" just made all of Kansas blush at being out self-righteoused. And they live in KANSAS.

Also, you know WAY too much about wine, and probably antiques. Get a real hobby.
Oct. 25, 2010, 9:55 pm
gb from park slope says:
for pity's sake, Stephanie..get some counseling! WTH? If you didn't show this to "The Big G" before it got printed, then I expect that divorce thing will soon be a reality....WAAAAAAAY too much information! And how very sad for your husband and kids to find out this way...
Oct. 27, 2010, 2:10 pm
OvertheFence from Charles Village says:
You must be kidding to say that what divorce teaches a child is that they have choices. Divorce teaches a child that their life could turn to crap at any moment, and that nothing is safe. It's a true lesson, and one we all eventually learn in life, but hardly as rosy as how you frame it.
Oct. 28, 2010, 12:22 pm
Starry eyed from Bullet Heights (CHN) says:
If The What gets married to Montrose I want to be at the wedding. Yes, I can see that. It could work. He was "flirting" with her between the lines all along.

*Someday this war is gonna end*

The What will return .........
Oct. 29, 2010, 5:08 pm
Seriously? from Brooklyn says:
Way too much personal information to be revealing in such a public forum, especially when a young child is involved. How will your kids feel about this article, and its archived comments, in 3 or 5 or 10 years when they're even more computer-savvy then they are today? Not to mention your husband. Or you, during a more rational moment? Best of luck sorting out your "ennui"... but sorry to break it to you, life is a lot of a "ennui" and not so much "flagrant hedonism", even though modern media seems to only want to portray the hedonism.
Nov. 1, 2010, 2:53 am
Miss Kitty from Park Slope says:
It looks as if some of these commenters know each other and are inside-joking about something other than the Thompson family. Who are some of these people?
Nov. 1, 2010, 7:42 pm
Manna from heaven says:
Miss Kitty: There were no inside jokes here. This was all very, very serious.
Nov. 2, 2010, 12:32 pm
Miss Kitty from Park Slope says:
Dear Manna, thanks for your explanation and for falling from heaven. I am much relieved! LOL :)
Nov. 2, 2010, 5:13 pm
R from Far away from you says:
To all the bored lifeless stroller pushing ladies of the slope.
Get a f---ing life. Take the stick out of ur asses and try to go for something a bit more real...... Use ur imagination. You're living in your little sheltered bubbles judging people left and right. What a bunch of self righteous ——s.
Your world is full of hypocrisy.....
Nov. 7, 2010, 2:25 am
katie b. from slope & clinton hill says:
park slope residents are some of the most over-tracked and over-trained dopes on earth! they're hyper-judgy and UNDER exposed. they're scripted to the eyeballs and take the literal world WAY TOO LITERALLY.

that said, i work with children, once as a teacher and now as a clinician. i wish more parents were more honest and straight with their kids, then their kids wouldn't grow up to be repeats of said underexposed naive parents. the eternal return...

the writer is being honest (which is what GOOD writing is!), and making public a private experience, which is as normal and common as, unfortunately, all you dopey goody toe shoes ——ing about nothing...

park slope, GROW UP! more importantly, GET REAL!
Sept. 16, 2011, 9:12 am
gell from new zealand says:

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Nov. 26, 2013, 8:37 am
sharron from texas says:

I want to use this opportunity to thank Dr Kasee for helping me to get my boyfriend back after 3 months of breakup.My boyfriend breakup with me because he see another girl at his working place and told me he is no longer interested in me and live me pain and heart break.I seek for help on the Net and i saw so many good talk about this spell caster Dr Kasee of onimalovespell@gmail.com and i contact him also and explain my problems to him and he cast a love spell for me which i use to get back my boyfriend within the period of 3 days and i am so greatful to him for the good work he did for me,that is why i also want to let everyone who is in need out there to also seek help from him so he can help.His email is ONIMALOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM you can contact and he will help you.
Dec. 28, 2013, 1:49 am
stellay from wwww says:
i just want to say a big thank you to BABA for what he has done for me,he brought back the man i loved and cherish with all my heart, A man who left me for another woman for good 3 years,with 2 kids,i just decided to check some spell caster's but all kept deceiving me,until i met Dr baba ,who told me everything will be over i tough he was also a scam.until he told me that my ex will be back in 2 days time.am so grateful today that my ex is back to me and we are happy and he always wanna be by my side,i will advice you people not to fall in the wrong hands but to contact Dr baba who is trustworthy and straight forward,you can contact him via email, worldwidesupremetemple@gmail.com
March 4, 10:14 pm

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