Markowitz will sing his bike lane parody at satire showcase

The Brooklyn Paper
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Borough President Markowitz is taking his anti-bike lane stance to the musical stage!

The Beep, who famously opposed the Prospect Park West bike lane on the grounds that it is anti-car, will perform his “Borough of Lanes” song parody as part of a political satire cabaret at the Kingsborough Performing Arts Center.

“When I’m done singing, I expect that the audience will rise to their feet and tell me to keep my day job,” said Markowitz, who first sang his bike-centric version of “My Favorite Things” at a City Council hearing in December and later used the lyrics on his annual holiday greeting card.

Markowitz will likely bring down the house at “Thalia Follies: A Political Cabaret,” but the April 16 showcase features professional performers, including Broadway vets, riffing on current events such as health care reform and overly touchy security agents at airports.

“One of the most fun songs in the piece is, ‘Don’t Touch My Junk,’ which is about the Transportation Security Administra­tion’s pat-downs,” said Isaiah Sheffer, show host and creator.

There are also more New York-centric scenes that focus on reckless cabbies, inconsiderate subway riders and what would happen if Schools Chancellor Cathie Black and “Tiger Mom” Amy Chua visited a city public school.

On a slate like that, bikes lanes were an obvious choice.

“We really wanted to connect to the political world of Brooklyn and appeal to a wider audience,” Sheffer said. “And people feel so strongly about bike lanes, so we knew we had to feature them.”

“Thalia Follies: A Political Cabaret” at the Kingsborough Performing Arts Center at Kingsborough Community College [2001 Oriental Blvd. at Decatur Avenue in Manhattan Beach, (718) 368-5596], April 16 at 8 pm. Tickets $25. For info, visit

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Reader Feedback

jerry from brighton beach says:
There's NO FOOL like an OLD FOOL !
April 4, 2011, 8:57 am
Kate from Williamsburg says:
Let's elect a younger non-buffoon to represent ALL of Brooklyn, not just the hidebound and decrepit.
April 4, 2011, 9:12 am
Jimmy from Windsor Terrace says:
I wonder if he'll sing for the other inmates when he winds up in prison for corruption.
April 4, 2011, 9:40 am
Mike says:
What an ass. Joking about street safety and doing his very best to make Brooklyn's streets more dangerous for pedestrians and cyclists.
April 4, 2011, 9:46 am
Michael from Prospect Heights says:
This son helps keep my son safe on the way to school. Markowitz thinks safety is a joke? I will pray for him.
April 4, 2011, 10:06 am
Michael from Prospect Heights says:
This LANE keeps my son safe.
April 4, 2011, 10:07 am
Tony from Bensonhurst says:
What an embarrassment this guy is. We really have to put up with him for three more years? Here are some photos of what Markowitz is railing against...
April 4, 2011, 10:45 am
other Michael from park slope says:
I wish he would give up his "day job".
April 4, 2011, 11:07 am
Steve from PPW says:
Simple message: Marty hates kids' safety, unless they are in cars.
April 4, 2011, 1:34 pm
Joey from Clinton Hills says:
Marty has three full time drivers, but Liberace on had one.
April 4, 2011, 1:39 pm
Tal Barzilai from Pleasantville, NY says:
I believe Marty Markowitz has been planted by the radicals in Transportation Alternatives and Streetsblog like that movie the Manchurian Candidate with Liev Schrieber. He's paid by them to say what they want him to say so that people will think that the real truth of bike lanes is as crazy as Marty is even though bike lanes are a terrible idea. No one will believe Marty that bike lanes are bad because he's so foolish or so I have read about. It's too bad, because bike lanes are terrible, kids should play in their backyards, and no one needs to cross streets that have cars on them. I wouldn't be surprised if Sadik-Khan and Marty have meetings to talk about their bike lane terrorism.
April 4, 2011, 1:44 pm
boof from brooklyn says:
Wait -- has Tal been a parody all this time? Good one, man! You had me going for years. Keep this kind of nonsense coming!
April 4, 2011, 1:52 pm
David from bedstuy says:
Bike lanes make streets safer for bikers and for pedestrians (by forcing cars to slow down). Markowitz should be ashamed of himself.
April 4, 2011, 2:12 pm
Henry from Bay Ridge says:
Will Marty get to Kingsborough by one of his three drivers? Is this what he meant when he said he was on-call 24/7?
April 4, 2011, 2:22 pm
Tal Barzilai from Pleasantville, NY says:
How interesting that someone claims I already commented, when I didn't come online until just now. Nice impersonation boof seeing that you commented shortly after it. BTW, you are suspect just for that. A better parady would show a person walking with the signal and a cyclist going right at them saying that they always have the right of a way. If you asked me, that's a good way to show what the rogue cyclists are really like.
April 4, 2011, 3:15 pm
Other Michael from Park Slope says:
rogue cyclists??

I love it.
April 4, 2011, 4:46 pm
boof from brooklyn says:
Haha. Maybe you can subpoena the IP addresses.
April 4, 2011, 4:56 pm
s from cobble hill says:
What an embarrassment to the borough this clown is. He's a walking advertisement to get rid of the patronage swamps that the borough presidency's are. Let him be a clown on his own dime, like Jim Walden.
April 4, 2011, 6:06 pm
Kalahari Dessert from Ft Greene says:
This sleazy man was able to buy his house partly from the proceeds of a slip and fall lawsuit, which probably had the indirect effect of jacking up everyone's insurance. What does this clown know about safety—except what seems like his every motivation: the unprincipled proceeds he can shovel into his bank account?

Markowitz and Vito Lopez are the poster boys for corruption and bad decisions in Brooklyn.

BTW: I also agree with Jimmy from Windsor Terrace: I foresee Markowitz serving some time.
April 4, 2011, 10:21 pm

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