A mugging at the Martyrs Monument

Monument mug

Two brazen thieves held up a young couple on Sept. 6 as the two love birds canoodled in Fort Greene Park.

The victims were sitting by the Prison Ship Martyr’s Monument at 11:30 pm when the thugs pulled a gun and ordered them to hand over their property before running off toward Washington Park with the loot.

Two on one

A pair of hooligans attacked a 33-year-old on Sept. 7 following a botched robbery at the corner of Washington Park and DeKalb Avenue.

The victim was on his way home from a nearby train station at 2:10 am when the fiends struck him with a metal rod. They tried to rifle the man’s pockets, but the victim hunkered down, refusing to give them any access.

Frustrated, the thieves continued with their attack, leaving the straphanger battered and bruised as they left empty-handed.

Spree nip

A gun-toting thug was on a roll as he robbed two people within a half an hour of each other on Sept. 7, but cops didn’t give him a chance to find a third victim.

The 18-year-old gunman held up a 20-year-old at the corner of Willoughby and Washington avenues at 11:30 pm and a 49-year-old nine blocks away at Lafayette Avenue and S. Oxford Street at 11:50 pm before being captured.

But he didn’t get much — only a Pratt ID from his first victim and $20 and some credit cards from his second mark, according to police.

Seeing red

A jilted lover lashed out at his ex-girlfriend’s new beau with a razor on Sept. 12 during a bloody confrontation inside an Adelphi Street nightclub.

The couple was at the Red Bamboo restaurant at DeKalb Avenue at 1:30 am when the woman’s ex saw them and charged over with his weapon out, catching his competition in the neck and hand.

The female victim chased after her former paramour, only to have him slash open her shoulder, police said.

Meter mope

A bonehead thief found himself behind bars on Sept. 11 after he crept into an occupied apartment on Clinton Avenue and told the surprised victim inside that he came to “read the water meter.”

The victim was catching an afternoon nap inside his home between Park and Myrtle avenues at 1 pm when the 36-year-old thief came in through the window.

Once discovered, the thief stammered out his meter man claim and ran out of the apartment — only to be arrested within the hour when cops caught him trying to break into a home on the next block.

Malled again

There were two more crimes inside the troubled Atlantic Terminal and Atlantic Center malls last week:

• A 14-year-old electronics addict tried to swipe an iPhone from a 10-year-old boy inside the Target in the crime-ridden Atlantic Terminal on Sept. 11, but was stopped before he could make off with the super-pricey toy.

The child’s step-father was named hero for the day after he chased down the teen inside the troubled shopping center at 5:30 pm and held him for police.

• A shoplifter was arrested on Sept. 12 after she tried to sneak out of the Old Navy in the Atlantic Center with $1,000 worth of stolen goods. Employees said the teenage thief tried to smuggle out 33 shirts and 12 pairs of pants from the store between S. Portland Avenue and Fort Greene Place at 2:10 pm, but was grabbed up before she could lug the clothes past the cash registers.

Clifton crook

A thief broke into a Clifton Place apartment on Sept. 6, removing $1,000 and a laptop computer.

The victimized tenant was on the upper level of his home between Grand and Classon avenues at 9:30 am when the thief sneaked in through a basement window, police were told.

Pricey pinch

A thief seized an opportunity and swiped a laptop computer from a car parked near St. James and Clifton places on Sept. 7.

The woman had just gotten into her car at 3 pm when she realized she left something at her school. She ran back to her school to retrieve the item, opting to leave her computer in the car.

The pinching pro managed to pop her door lock and remove the computer in the 10 minutes it took his victim to return to her 2007 Dodge Caravan.

Metal menace

A thug attacked a 26-year-old woman with a metal object on Sept. 9 during a violent — and apparently unprovoked — confrontation at the corner of Clinton and Lafayette avenues.

The victim was walking to a train just before 4 am when the menace attacked, leaving her with a deep cut to the head that needed mending at a local hospital.

Pocketing books

It was a “here one minute, gone the next” week at the 88th Precinct. Here’s the rundown:

• A thief palmed a woman’s purse as she ate inside the Cornerstone Cafe on Adelphi Street on Sept. 4. She said the bag was on a chair right next to her at 1:45 am when the phantom purse snatcher swiped it — as well as the iPhone and credit cards inside.

• A slippery eel managed to snag a woman’s computer bag at 9:30 pm on Sept. 8 as she and her fiancée dined at the Applebee’s on Flatbush Avenue Extension between DeKalb Avenue and Fulton Street.

• An iPod Touch, a cellphone and several credit cards were among the items in a bag taken from a patron at Dino’s on DeKalb Avenue on Sept. 9. The 29-year-old diner said she left her bag unattended for just a few moments inside the eatery between Clermont Avenue and Adelphi Street at 8:15 pm.

• Talk about a haul! A hooligan managed to slip out of Pequena on S. Portland Avenue on Sept. 9 with a woman’s duffle bag. The woman didn’t realize her bag was missing until 9 pm, when she turned to get out her purse to pay her tab at the eatery between Lafayette Avenue and Fulton Street.