Fashion faux pas for Curlers

Now, before every curler in the world gets on my case I don’t mean this to be an insult against the sport.But, Olympics, really?

The sport of curling seems pleasant enough, a bunch of guys or gals, ladies are included too, four on a team (I think), try to get the opposing team’s stone out of the bulls eye while putting their own closest to the center. The team with the most stones closest to the center wins the match. This is accomplished by one member sliding a granite stone down an icy runway while two other teammates with brooms sweep a path in front of it, as another chants “Sweep, Sweep” – Imagine bocce on ice with a pep squad. Nice, but not world competition worthy.

Besides, when did sweeping become competitive?After all I, along with thousands of other house-keepers, have swept for centuries and to the best of my knowledge none of us have ever been invited to compete in the Olympics. We house-keepers would like a shot at the Gold, Silver or Bronze. We could medal in best corners swept or most dust particles collected in the dust bin on the first try.

To me watching curling is akin to watching sports fishing or bowling on TV. I need the excitement, jaw-dropping awe and exhilaration from watching daring skiers sloshing down courses at break-neck speed; figure skaters, especially the pairs, flinging, jumping and twirling about, boogie boarders traversing the half pipe, whole pipe and smoke the pipe and the nail bitting, sitting on the edge of your seat, fight breaking out, ice hockey games. But curling? I just don’t see the fascination.

Besides, America’s curling team members don’t even have jazzy costumes to wear like the other contenders. The Norwegian Olympic curling team tried to jazz up the sport by wearing slacks imprinted with large diamond shapes in garish colors and a white collared T-shirt, but this fashion faux pas only had the pointy shoes and the Jester’s cap missing. Come on now, if you want to be in the Olympics you have to at leasthave a trendy look -maybe some sequins and bling to catch the sparkle of the ice.

Not for nuthin’ but since its Fashion Week the American Curler’s Association should try to get a fashion designer to create a specialized look for them. Maybe Ralph Lauren can be persuaded to redesign his famous polo shirt- only instead of a guy on a horse he can have a guy with a broom and a stone. [email protected]