For Brooklyn Kickball teams who look pretty but win ugly, Sunday was a godsend.
Cool temperatures and high winds blew dust storms onto the field, undermining the efforts of the finesse teams while helping out gritty teams like Brooklyn United and Majesty.
The much-anticipated match-up between the league’s top two teams in the standings never did materialize, but both added hard-fought wins on Sunday to their improving resumes.
Top-seeded Majesty dispatched Diddy’s White Party just in time for the MTV Music Video Awards, 5-1, and took out 10th-ranked Licensed to Thunder in the nightcap, 8-3.
Majesty captain Rochelle “Kitten” Fainstein credits the team’s “cultural diversity” and the fact that Licensed to Thunder, who lost earlier in the day to the eighth-ranked Mathletes, was ill prepared to play.
“We’re going to beat them,” Fainstein said before the game. “They’re really drunk.”
Second-seeded Brooklyn United rode away from the seventh-ranked Pony Boys, 3-1, before stomping on the much-improved Mathletes, 9-2.
“We had a perfect game going through three innings and could have won by Mercy Rule if we kicked first, but we never got to kick in the fifth inning since we were the “home team,” said Brooklyn United captain Justin “Thomas” Taylor.
With league favorites Never Scared, the New Frontiersmen, the John Cougar Mellencamps, and Crucial Taunt all on bye weeks this week, lesser-known teams such as the Lightning Turtles and Space Cadets used the weekend as an opportunity to gain a leg up.
A sluggish start against the Mau Maus led to an early 6-2 hole, but the Turtles patiently chipped away at the lead, finally winning, 7-6, thanks to fifth-inning singles by Adam “Jackson” Pollock and Damian “Hume” Britt.
“It was the win of the night,” said Pollock.
On the main field, the Space Cadets dispatched Taco Taco Taco with equally methodically run support behind a barrage of timely hits from Susan “Vincent” Gallo and David “Jose” Jimenez
The uneven performance did little to dissuade the triple Tacos’ Roland “Thunderleg” James, Paul “Westwood” Rhyand, and Chelsey “Eastwood” Estridge, who blamed the weather and “Arizona” for the losses.
Asked whether the tacos in the team’s t-shirt were pork, beef, or chicken, Estridge replied, “it’s f—ing everything you want! We offer every flavor.”
That adaptability will be key for success in future games, especially considering that teams such as Dolls with Balls recorded its first victory Sunday and could appear to be on a roll.
Dolls Captain Julia “Tomorrow” Morrow praised her teammates for the 3-2 victory over Hot Mess, and nearly toppled the Sugar Tits! in a high scoring 8-6 defeat.
“It feels great!” said Morrow. “I don’t know what happened. We got pissed.”
Just another grind-it-out victory for a team that looks pretty but wins ugly on Kickball Sunday.
