Lazy river too much work

The Brooklyn Paper
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Every morning at the Monte Carlo’s pool entrance, there are hundreds of guests waiting for the pool to open. The pool area is gorgeous with four pools. Guests line up to get poolside lounge chairs that have mats, although the other lounge chairs are just as comfortable. Where you want to sit in the shade of the palm trees or for the sun worshippers facing the sun is another factor; having the ability to rotate your lounge facing the sun. It had to be near the steps of the pool for me.

About 8.30 the kids line up with their tubes, rafts and floating devises raring to go rafting on the Lazy River.Sharon and I were in the midst of the throng, me in my scooter, and she with her bag of Sun Protection oils.So while waiting for the pool rush to open, similar to the Gold Rush scenes in the old westerns, we made conversation with a mother with her two children carrying huge rubber tubes for the Lazy River. Wow, what a great souvenir to bring our grandchildren from Las Vegas! I joked with the kids, telling them I didn’t need a rubber tire -- I had one built in. I lifted up my belly and they laughed.

The option to splash in the Wave Pool or simply drift away on a raft through the 400-foot-long Lazy River, or just dip in the main pool is the hardest decision to make at the pool area. I followed the kids to the Lazy River, parked my scooter near the steps and immediately got carried away with the current.I was hysterical laughing. Not only was I floating without any flotation devise, and even though the pool was only four feet deep, I had no control and was dashed from wall to wall, around the curves past the steps, then the other steps and past the steps I started from. I was laughing so hard I slipped while standing, swallowing water; the first time that’s happened to me in 60 years. Mind you, I was a lifeguard in Coney Island for three years at Ravenhall Pool, rescuing 60 people, and on the Brooklyn Tech City Champs swim team for two years. I also have the unique ability to float in a vertical position without using my hands or kicking. This I attribute to all the fat in my body which keeps me on the surface%u2026except in the Lazy River. There were literally hundreds of kids and adults in the Lazy River on their rafts having a hell of a time; I was concentrating on avoiding hitting them and desperately trying to stay afloat. This I did for 40 minutes and saw Sharon yelling to me, “Get out of the pool!” I yelled back, “That’s what I’ve been trying to do for the last 20 minutes!The steps that I parked my scooter near were right after this curve in the Lazy River pool that gushed out heavy currents of water that made it impossible to get onto the steps to exit.Four times I tried and each time the current pushed me past the handrail descending into the pool.When I finally succeeded in getting out, I went back to Sharon vowing that was the last time I would go into the Lazy River.

Screech at you next week!

Updated 11:48 am, January 16, 2019
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