Regular readers of this column know that I would rather be aboard a cruise ship than anywhere else in the world.
My roommate and I just returned from our 93rd excursion and as we disembarked the ship and headed towards the Customs and Immigration lines, huge signs above large pails shouted “drop that piece of fruit right here!” The Department of Agriculture forbids us from entering the United States with fruits and vegetables. Get caught with one banana and you will have to pay a $250 fine. Wow! You can enter the United States with tuberculosis, syphilis, gonorrhea and even AIDS, but you must not bring in a banana.
I guess those bananas sure are dangerous.
When sailing on a cruise from south Florida, one of the more popular ports of call is Key West. A very frequently photographed tombstone of a non-celebrity is in a cemetery located a short walk from the dock. As we entered the cemetery, I spotted a worker who was clearly familiar with the tombstone and before I could even ask he said “It’s right there!” We headed over to it, and looked for the inscription that we heard so much about: “I told you I was sick.”
I gave some thought to the engraving and I asked myself “Why would any person in his right mind fake a serious illness? It’s not exactly like a middle-school student claiming a headache to stay home and miss the exam for which he didn’t study.”
Speaking of faking it, there are many Americans who are accusing Secretary of State Hillary Clinton of doing just that so whe could avoid appearing before a congressional committee to answer questions about the Benghazi tragedy. We heard all about her catching the “Benghazi Flu” and “Diplomatic Illness.” Then, while in the hospital after taking a spill, physicians discovered that she has a blood clot on her brain. I am reminded of the rules of Grandma’s scientifically accurate medical principle we learned in the third grade: “Don’t ever make believe you are sick. If you make believe you are sick one day, you will really get sick the next.”
There are those in this world that actually believe Hillary faked it and is now paying a serious price.
I’m not a Hillary fan. I don’t like her, but according to what I’ve read, she is a sick woman. I truly believe she is sick but, on the other side of the coin, I don’t blame the folks that don’t believe her. She finds it difficult to tell the truth. This woman has lied about very unimportant matters such as what baseball team she roots for. Yankees? White Sox? Who cares?
She told real whoppers such as how she was under sniper fire when she left an airplane in Bosnia. Witnesses and photos proved she was actually being presented with flowers on the ramp. She told the world that Chelsea was jogging around the World Trade Center on 9-11 when Chelsea was at home watching it on TV. She has spouted so many lies that William Safire wrote in the New York Times, “Hillary Clinton is a congenital liar.” I am StanGershb
Read Stan Gershbein's column every Monday on BrooklynDaily.com.