I’m madder than a frustrated mom that spends hours trying to put her baby to sleep only to hear it screaming after a gang of Harley Davidson aficionados BBbbbbrrrrroooooaaammmmed their way past many, many buildings and houses disturbing everyone’s peace over the fact that what I just described just happened to me, only it was my lovely wife Sharon putting me to sleep and me who was awoken by the motorcycles, which scared the bejeezus out of me and now I can’t sleep!
Look, you all know that one of the Screecher’s golden rules is to get a good night’s sleep and wake up fresh as a daisy so as to be prepared for a full day of Screeching!
But that doesn’t mean I sometimes don’t pull an all-nighter, like I did last week to watch the Pope prance through New York City, among other nations in this here great nation, and it certainly messed with my body clock.
But seeing the 83-year-old Pontiff’s [Editor’s note: The Pope is 78] spirit and energy never, ever falter kept me going, and I enjoyed every minute of it.
Well, almost every minute.
The only thing that bothered me the whole time — and every time I watch the Zenith in the living room — are those darn interruptions that happen every few minutes just when the show starts to get interesting. You know, those things that come on and start telling you stuff they think you need to know. And in the end, they usually want you to buy something!
In fact, I think it is the fault of these breaks in the action that inadvertently led me to gain a few hundred too many pounds over the years, because whenever they came on, I headed over to the fridge, thinking that the exercise I was getting walking back and forth would offset the calories I was about to take in. [Editor’s note: It doesn’t work that way].
And then there’s the other problem I have with these breaks: When I don’t head to the bathroom or go for a snack, I usually end up buying something — especially if the deal ends within the next 10 minutes.
Folks, I hate to break the news to you, but the Screecher has been a sucker for gadgets since I first laid eyes on those X-ray glasses in the Zorro comics I read as a kid.
So now, I’m surrounded by Ginsu knives and every time I cheer during “Dancing with the Stars,” all the lights in my apartment go off — along with the television! [Editor’s note: Carmine, don’t plug the television into your Clapper].
The latest mistake I made was quickly ordering a new-fangled camera called a Pro Go [Editor’s note: That’s it, I’m out]. Apparently, you can take these things inside those enclosed waterslides that I can’t fit in, and seeing that on the commercial made me want to get one. Check that, it told me that I needed one.
So now I’ve got one of these on the way and I can’t wait to zip down 86th Street on Tornado taking moving pictures of everyone I see!
In last week’s column I informed you that Councilman Mark Treyger was successful in getting W. 17th Street and Mermaid Avenue co-named the Lou Powsner Place, and on Saturday, in front of hundreds of friends, family, politicos, co-workers, business associates and local devoted businessmen who truly appreciated all that Lou did for us all, we officially unveiled the sign.
“Mr. Brooklyn,” former Borough President Marty Markowitz told that he learned through experience that when Lou called, he answered, otherwise he would never, ever stop calling.
Community News Group editor-in-chief Vince DiMiceli spoke of Lou and all that battles and victories attributed to him, including the number of arrests made by his chasing after alleged thugs who just robbed him by blowing his police whistle, at that point I blew my police whistle to honor him.
The family asked me to speak but I declined because I had to interject my “Yeeaahhs!” when needed to inspire applause.
The family was very gracious and appreciative of the wonderful turnout for their irreplaceable Lou Powsner. Just a bit more of Lou Powsner: he died the same day that Brooklyn-born Mickey Rooney died. And the community honored him the same weekend that the Pope asked us all to work together. That’s right! Two great inspirations — the Pope and Powsner.
It was a great week for everyone!
Screech at you next week!