Trump didn’t learn what I taught my kids in the sandbox

for Brooklyn Paper
Share on TwitterTweet
Share on Facebook

Don’t miss our updates:

I am not a prude. Anyone who knows me knows I say four-letter words as common parlance, including the one that starts with “f.”

My kids speak in front of my husband and I in a way that would make a sailor blush, even if they excuse themselves by saying “it’s a quote” from a popular rap song or a show they watch.

And, still, I am horrified and disgusted that this joke of a Presidential election forces me to listen to and discuss “grabbing p----” as part of mainstream political discourse.

In some ways, I guess, I have wished for this. To de-shame sexuality is important, and I am often called on by friends to be the one to go there. Sex is not something we should shy away from talking about with others — including our children — as it is an important part of life, for sure. But the way Trump has spoken, the horrible demeaning way in which he has thought about women (let alone how he has actually treated them, and touched them), the way he has used and abused his power and women have felt they needed to play along — these are things I wish I didn’t have to speak about. These are the things I wish didn’t exist.

The thing is, since he amazingly and alarmingly gained the world’s attention and the Republican Party’s nomination, I have understood. There is a cry for “honesty,” the honest fears and hatreds that people in our society feel — be it against Muslims or Mexican immigrants or the powers that be. There is a forceful push, understandably, for so very many things to be unveiled, the things that people in this country really feel.

But do people honestly think that it is Trump who will take us there? If that is the case, it is a truly upsetting conversation to have to have with my adolescent boys.

My boys do watch and listen. They tell me things that are being said in the media, online, since so often I cannot bear to pay close attention. It is, I suppose, a great opportunity to talk about sexism and racism, and xenophobia, about all the things people have come to this country to escape since its inception.

But it gives me great pain to acknowledge that this place we call home, this great nation I was born in and gave birth to my progeny in, would even consider for a second putting a leader in place whose thoughts and deeds are as greedy and grab-what-you-want as I taught my boys not to be in the sandbox.

We do have to work to make America great again — after letting this joker get this far and so alter our public discourse.

Read Fearless Parenting every other Thursday on
Updated 10:17 pm, July 9, 2018
Today’s news:
Share on TwitterTweet
Share on Facebook

Don’t miss our updates:

Reasonable discourse

Jared from New York Observer says:
This writer would never work for *my* newspaper. She deserves to be fired.
Oct. 13, 2016, 6:49 pm
Beverly says:
Having a potty mouth does not make you "not a prude". You have a very narrow idea of what you find acceptable, and your attitude towards sexuality is fairly conservative. Yes, you probably curse a lot and speak in a vulgar manner - that is something entirely different and nothing to be proud of.
Oct. 14, 2016, 3:45 am
Cynthia Nitzzie from Long Island says:
@Beverly - how can you call this woman a prude? Stephie and I grew up together, and listen to me - the woman is a straight up freak! There is literally nothing she wouldn't do : doggie, cattie, backwards donkey, she'll even do a Chinese guy! So how can a hump doodle like her be a prude??!
Oct. 15, 2016, 3:03 am
Leather is for pussies says:
'attitude towards sexuality is fairly conservative'? She's taken it as far as it can go… nothing is as kinky, as giving birth… all else is just fiddling around.
Oct. 15, 2016, 2:47 pm
old time brooklyn from slope says:
Yep, nothing say class like potty mouthed kids
Oct. 16, 2016, 11:59 am
John Wasserman from Prospect Heights says:
Pardon me, but I don't think that having one of these "fouled mouths" makes a person any more "cool" than someone with a clean mouth.
John Wasserman
Oct. 17, 2016, 11:37 am

Comments closed.

First name
Last name
Your neighborhood
Email address
Daytime phone

Your letter must be signed and include all of the information requested above. (Only your name and neighborhood are published with the letter.) Letters should be as brief as possible; while they may discuss any topic of interest to our readers, priority will be given to letters that relate to stories covered by The Brooklyn Paper.

Letters will be edited at the sole discretion of the editor, may be published in whole or part in any media, and upon publication become the property of The Brooklyn Paper. The earlier in the week you send your letter, the better.

Keep it local!

Stay in touch with your community. Subscribe to our free newsletter: