October 20, 2007: Vol. 30, No. 41

The public has spoken and it has said a mouthful: Akituusaq.

That’s the new name of the baby walrus at the New York Aquarium, as selected by the 9,400 people who voted on the “Today” show Web site.

Is this any way to pick the name for the first son of Ayveq, the aquarium’s famously masturbating walrus?

“We did it to get the public involved,” said Aquarium spokeswoman Fran Hackett. “Since this is New York’s first walrus baby, we wanted to get everyone talking about him.

The name Akituusaq means “a gift given in return” in the Yupik language (which the walrus doesn’t speak, by the way). It was chosen from a list of five names put forward by the Aquarium. It beat out Utvak (“ice cube”) by a vote of 4,322 to 2,042. Those are Reagan-Mondale numbers.

Utumek (“Earth”) and Ukiivak (“King Island”) finished third and fourth.

Hackett did make it clear that Aquarium staffers would have preferred the other names, but are willing to abide by the results of the election (unlike the Supreme Court in 2000).

“We would have loved an easier name to pronounce, like Utvak, but Akituusaq is fine. We’re calling him Aki for short.”

Since making his debut on Sept. 27, the baby walrus (right) has porked up to 276 pounds and remains joined at the hip with his mom, Kulusiq. Indeed, he still has had no contact with his famously self-flagellating father, Ayveq, who would regard him as competition for the ladies.

The good news: as The Brooklyn Paper reported exclusively two weeks ago, Ayveq is still a prodigious self-abuser — to the delight of Aquarium visitors.

©2007 The Brooklyn Paper