Five things to do in Brooklyn this week!

Friday

September 4

Hello, Dolly!

No, the outspoken, big-bosomed queen of country music is not coming to Brooklyn tonight — but you can hear some Dolly Parton doppelgangers tonight at “Dollypalooza,” where drag queens, impersonators and cover bands will celebrate the unapologetically artificially-enhanced artist. Stop by after your 9 to 5 and contribute some cash Dolly’s “Imagination” literacy program.

8 pm at Littlefield [622 Degraw St. between Third and Fourth avenues in Gowanus, (718) 569–7810, www.littlefieldnyc.com] $20 ($15 in advance).

Saturday

September 5

Mane man

Brooklyn is the world’s leading producer of elaborately coiffed facial hair, and the Eighth Annual Coney Island Beard and Moustache Competition will crown the truly hirsute hero who can lead us into a neatly-groomed golden age. And there’s a category for best fake beard, too, because Coney loves a mountebank.

8 pm,

Sideshows by the Seashore [1208 Surf Ave. between W. 12th Street and Stillwell Avenue in Coney Island, (718) 372–5159, www.coneyisland.com]

. $20.

Monday

September 7

Feathered fall

Autumn is still a few weeks away, so celebrate summer with the sight of flesh and feathers along Eastern Parkway! The annual West Indian American Day Parade will be shaking its tail feathers all along the route, and you can groove to the Caribbean rhythms while chowing down on jerk chicken from the street festival. Enjoy the warm weather while you can!

11 am–5 pm along Eastern Parkway, from Utica Avenue to Grand Army Plaza. (www.wiadcacarnival.org). Free.

Tuesday

September 8

Inside snoop

Wikileaks honcho Julian Assange is still penned up in the Ecuadorian embassy in London, but this is your chance to see him speak! Tonight he chats via video link with journalist Jeremy Scahill about the latter’s book “The Wikileak Files: The World According to the U.S. Empire.” If you attend, you also get a copy of the compendium of leaked knowledge.

8 pm at Bell House [149 Seventh St. at Third Avenue in Gowanus, (718) 643–6510, www.thebellhouseny.com]. $10.

Thursday

September 10

Beat goes up

The Brooklyn Emerging Artists in Theater Festival takes over most of Brooklyn for the next ten days, and on opening night it seizes the Brooklyn Museum. Almost every corner of the sprawling arts complex will contain performing artists from the festival, so you can get a sampler of comedy, dance (like the Jamal Jackson Dance Company performer pictured), opera, and theater, all in one night.

7–9 pm at the Brooklyn Museum [200 Eastern Pkwy. at Washington Avenue in Prospect Heights, (718) 638–5000, www.beatbrooklyn.com]. $16 suggested donation.