Sections

Brooklyn only option for DNC 2016

The donkey in the room: Every other candidate to host political bash stinks

The Brooklyn Paper
Share on TwitterTweet
Share on Facebook
Subscribe

Get our stories in your inbox, free.

Like Brooklyn Paper on Facebook.

Brooklyn is in the running to host the 2016 Democratic National Convention and, obvious as the choice may be to us, our fair borough has to win over not only the city government, which also included Manhattan venues in its pitch letter, but the Democratic National Committee, to whom the letter was addressed. With that in mind, and with Philadelphia safely off the table, we figured we would turn our attention to the remaining 13 shortlisted cities and explain to committee chairwoman Debbie Wasserman Schultz why each of them is a bad idea. Here we go.

— Matthew Perlman

Atlanta


The city known to many as Hot-lanta is gridlocked even when there are not two inches of snow on the ground and would be hell to navigate in convention season, which takes place during the dog days of summer.


It is also the home of popular rapper 2 Chainz, perhaps best known for his maxim “I’m riding around and I’m getting it/It’s mine; I spend it.” The association could only serve to hurt the party Republican propagandists have made synonymous with out-of-control spending.


Chicago


Deep-dish pizza is not real pizza. What would the delegates eat?


Cleveland


Also known as “The Mistake by the Lake,” Cleveland may be home to the only body of water more polluted than the Gowanus Canal — the Cuyahoga River. That thing actually caught on fire, which, though it served as inspiration for a seminal Randy Newman song, does not bode well for a stay’s health impact on delegates.


Columbus, Ohio


What Philadelphia Rep. Bob Brady said — there is nothing there. Okay, besides watching college football.


Detroit


Bankrupt, dangerous, and, since Michigan’s conservative governor implemented the Emergency Manager Law, empowering the state to take over municipalities deemed fiscally unsound and replaced the elected government with appointees, Republican territory. We feel for these guys, but the city is just not in good shape to host a convention. Plus, it would be depressing.


Indianapolis


It might help the party of the limousine liberal to associate itself with Middle America, but think of the travel costs associated with transporting tens of thousands of people from coastal cities there.


Las Vegas


Surely Brooklyn is classier than Vegas. Also, how would you get the delegates off the casino floor and into the convention itself? And think of all the potentially damaging video that could surface in the months leading up to the election.


This one is a nonstarter.


Miami


You cannot hold a convention on the beach. No one will take you seriously, including attendees. Are you trying to host an arena-centered TV spectacle with viral potential or a white-linen party for your friends?


If you answered the former, get your sensible business-wear to the independent-media capital of world.


Nashville


The TV-show is hot right now, but trying to have its luster rub off on your-pre-chosen candidate is too obvious. Who are you going to get to DJ country music? And if you have that figured out, how are you going to get a giant crowd of people to sit still for it?


Orlando, Florida


Silly donkey, Disney is for kids.


Phoenix, Arizona


The average high in Phoenix in September is 100 degrees. Now, that is dry heat we are talking about. Do organizers want to be responsible for their party faithful turning into walking pieces of beef jerky?


Also, there would be the ever-present danger that Sheriff Joe Arpaio reads everyone in attendance the Riot Act and proceeds to lock up conventioneers in tent jails, wearing stripes and pink underwear.


Pittsburgh


The City of Bridges is actually kind of nice, if you don’t mind driving up and down terrifyingly steep hills and sharing air with fans of the hated Pittsburgh Steelers. But with a population of just 306,000, the former steel capital is a tenth the size of our hometown, meaning a huge number fewer potential voters to be wooed by the presence of the big event.


Salt Lake City


Politics is sordid enough without bringing polygamy into the equation.


Today’s news:
Share on TwitterTweet
Share on Facebook
Subscribe

Get our stories in your inbox, free.

Like Brooklyn Paper on Facebook.

Reasonable discourse

John from Sunset Park says:
I hope it happens.
But Barclays may be to small, and we have no hotel rooms.
April 30, 2014, 1:57 am
Winthrop Bogart Wainwright VII from New Lots says:
There's plenty of room, you don't just need hotels. Think outside the box.

Plenty of Brooklyn's Home Grown Democrists like Clarence Norman and Carl Kruger are behind bars right now. The party can use their empty pads for slumber parties.

Just keep Vito Lopez away from Sandra Fluke wherever they all stay. All the free NYC slickers are being smuggled into the Dominican Republic.
April 30, 2014, 7:22 am
Mike from Williamburg says:
Now that New York has passed the National Popular Vote bill, it's almost relevant that you can influence more voters in Brooklyn than in any swing state.
April 30, 2014, 9:49 am
Peter Engel from Downtown Brooklyn says:
No hotels? Sheraton, Marriott and Nu with more coming, plus a few cheaper ones on 4th Ave. are all in walking distance. Ft. Greene, Atlantic Ave. plus 5th Ave in the Slope is restaurant heaven.
April 30, 2014, 1:19 pm
Epiphany from Ex-Brooklyn says:
Brooklyn is perfect venue for a corrupt political machine to throw a party. Heck, the borough is headed by a cat named Eric Adams, who is under several federal corruption probes, as The Brooklyn's Paper's "sister" publication reported on March 14, 2013:

"The city’s Department of Investigation is probing Brooklyn Borough President Eric Adams following complaints that he and his staff hit up local business and community leaders for cash to fund pet projects with money to be funneled through a nonprofit that doesn’t exist, sources told The Post."

In Brooklyn politics (tightly fixed by the corrupt Democratic Party machine) Adams is the rule and not the exception. And how appropriate for a system rotten to the core to do business with Bartclays who cheated and made money fixing interest rates:

"Barclays hit with £290m fine over Libor fixing. Barclays has been fined £290m for attempting to manipulate the world’s benchmarking borrowing rate in a blow to the bank’s reputation that has raised questions over the future of chief executive Bob Diamond. " (Source: The Telegraph. 27 Jun 2012).

But hey, it's Brooklyn where the biggest heroes are people like Jay Z - ex-crack dealers who later went on to do business, man with Barclays (and is a regular guest of the Obamas). Dust off your donkey flags, because the non-union mules of Brooklyn will be sweeping up the confetti off the Barclays floor post party, while the massive corporate donations will keep flowing into the Clintons' bank accounts (granted, maybe a little trickle into Brooklyn neighborhoods and households). This is what happens when one party controls a borough.
April 30, 2014, 2:21 pm
Pat Paulson from Smotherston says:
NY is in the bag for Democrats. Better Pa or even better FL.
April 30, 2014, 2:30 pm
Epiphany from Ex-Brooklyn says:
By the way, the above post gave references to the city corruption probe against Eric Adams. Here is a link (below) to a source about the federal corruption probe against Borough President Adams and State Senator Velmanette Montgomery.

Brooklyn is badly in need of political reform; needs some young, smart, honest people to step up and do the public work. How about a new party that focuses on people and neighborhoods, not pure power and money? The Brooklyn Democratic Machine would surely try to crush it, but it's worth a try! And I don't think a new party would hold their convention at The Barclays Center. Lots of other wonderful non-controversal venues in Brooklyn.

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/05/09/nyregion/court-to-name-officials-recorded-in-corruption-inquiry.html?_r=0
April 30, 2014, 6:47 pm
jay from nyc says:
we don't have hotel rooms but we do have airbnb!
April 30, 2014, 7:36 pm

Enter your comment below

By submitting this comment, you agree to the following terms:

You agree that you, and not BrooklynPaper.com or its affiliates, are fully responsible for the content that you post. You agree not to post any abusive, obscene, vulgar, slanderous, hateful, threatening or sexually-oriented material or any material that may violate applicable law; doing so may lead to the removal of your post and to your being permanently banned from posting to the site. You grant to BrooklynPaper.com the royalty-free, irrevocable, perpetual and fully sublicensable license to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, perform and display such content in whole or in part world-wide and to incorporate it in other works in any form, media or technology now known or later developed.

First name
Last name
Your neighborhood
Email address
Daytime phone

Your letter must be signed and include all of the information requested above. (Only your name and neighborhood are published with the letter.) Letters should be as brief as possible; while they may discuss any topic of interest to our readers, priority will be given to letters that relate to stories covered by The Brooklyn Paper.

Letters will be edited at the sole discretion of the editor, may be published in whole or part in any media, and upon publication become the property of The Brooklyn Paper. The earlier in the week you send your letter, the better.