They say you can’t tell the players without a scorecard, but with this year’s Cyclones, the scorecard isn’t much help.
That’s because there are three Browns on this year’s squad — and, face it, you’re going to mix them up all season long. So here’s our guide:
• Dylan Brown — the hunky Brown: The 23-year-old Tampa native played for the Gulf Coast Mets last year, but didn’t do so well, hitting .173 and striking out 55 times in 139 at-bats.
• Brandon Brown — the cocky Brown: A native of Cantonment, Fla., this 23-year-old, 22nd-round draft pick spent last year in rookie league ball, where he batted .209.
• J.B. Brown — the humble Brown: The pride of Alvin, Tex, he hit .302 for the Cyclones last year.
But how will they make their mark?
“I’m the best looking Brown,” said Dylan Brown, drawing surprisingly little disagreement from his fellow Browns. Objectively speaking, this crew-cutted Derek Jeter lookalike is the most conventionally attractive of the three.
“But I’ve got the swagger,” said Brandon Brown, who seems unable to take a photo in which he is not smoldering towards the camera, his cap slightly askew.
That left J.B. Brown in the obvious role: “I’m the humble Brown.”
Not that he’ll be forgotten.
“J.B. is the ‘Lovable Brown,’ ” Brandon Brown said. “He’s the glue that holds us together.”
Who knows what the future holds for these minor league Mets — but for now, you can call this team the Brooklyn Browns.