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Didn’t rob me? Well, I’m hitting you anyway

Batter up

A thug struck a man with a baseball bat on Fourth Avenue after wrongly suspecting him of robbing him on Feb. 14.

The victim told police that he was at Douglass Street at 3:15 when a man wearing a green jacket and a ski cap approached him shouting, “You took my bag,” and accused the man of stealing his gift cards.

The victim responded that he didn’t know what the thug was talking about and let him search his own bags. When the search came up empty, the perp hit the man’s left arm with a metal bat and fled down Fourth Avenue.

Tips travesty

A thug stole a waiter’s wallet from the restaurant Barrio on Seventh Avenue on Feb. 19.

The victim told cops that he put his wallet on a shelf in the locker room around 8 pm at the end of his shift.

After changing his clothes, he left the restaurant, which is at Third Street, without the wallet. When he returned minutes later, the billfold — and the $1,650 it held — was nowhere to be found.

Pickpocket party

Thieves swiped at least two iPhones last week. Here are the details:

• A thief swiped an Apple app-phone at Union Hall on Feb. 13. The victim told cops that she was at the club on Union Street near Fifth Avenue at 1 am when a perp bumped into her and lifted the device.

• Two hooligans stole one on Union Street on Feb. 16. The victim told cops that she was between Fifth and Fourth avenues at 5:40 pm when two men wearing snorkel jackets approached her. One man pushed her and the other reached into her pocket to snatch the phone.

Parking problems

At least four cars were swiped or broken into this week:

• A car was robbed in the lot of towing company on 14th Street last week. The victim told cops that his 2008 Pontiac had been damanged in an accident on Feb. 11 and taken to a Towing and Collision lot Second and Third avenues for repair. But when he picked up the car four days later, he discovered that a fancy DJ-ing system, two computers and a $2,500 Breitling watch were missing.

• A 1999 Honda Civic — one of the most-popular cars among parts-hungry thieves — was lifted from Second Street between Seventh and Eighth avenues between Feb. 15 and 18.

• An even older Honda Civic was stolen from Third Street last week. The victim told cops that he had parked a 17-year-old sedan between Fourth and Fifth avenues on Feb. 12 and returned two days later to find the antediluvian automobile gone.

• A perp swiped a motorcycle from Douglass Street overnight on Feb. 15. The victim told cops that he parked his 2004 Vespa by Bond Street at 8 pm, and returned the next morning to find the Euro-scooter gone.

405 Douglass St.

— L. Gottesdiener