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Hey, Mayor Mike! Don’t let the door hit you

Our benevolent and (thankfully) outgoing mayor has yet again protected us from ourselves and our inability to make any informed choices.

This time he has signed a bill that raises the legal age to sell tobacco products, including those zany new e-cigarettes, to 21.

Now, it would seem since children younger than 18 are currently buying cigarettes, that raising the age to 21 shouldn’t really pose a problem, considering how inventive our teens are. However, our nanny mayor has patted himself on his smug little back and thinks that this is the way to go. And it has worked so well on raising the drinking age too. LOL!

Has our mayor never heard of having a fake ID? Let’s face it, if a teen wants to try smoking, raising the age is really not a deterrent.

It really is endearing to think that as his administration is winding down, and the city is about to welcome Bill DeBlasio to Gracie Mansion, to know that Mayor Bloomberg is still trying to police our every move from beyond the gate.

You would think with all the babysitting he has done, we truly are incapable of making any sort of intelligent decisions. In fact if you look at the past 12 years of his administration, we have had more “don’ts” than “do’s.”

We no longer have to worry about trans-fats, salt, super-sized sodas (although that one is still on the fence), childhood obesity, and, of course, no smoking in parks or beaches.

Now, all we have to worry about are overcrowded classrooms, failing schools, high real-estate taxes, open union contracts for city employees (which, when finally ratified, will bankrupt the city), bike lanes (what a traffic snag they are), bike rentals (a monumental faux pas), paying parents to be parents (an even bigger debacle than the sugary drink ban), high electric, water, and utility rates, high gasoline taxes, and higher taxes on cigarettes.

In essence, thanks to Mayor Mike, not only will you have to be 21 to buy a pack of cigarettes, you will need to earn a six-figure income to do so.

Not for Nuthin,™ but I really can’t complain. Because of the mayor’s helpful hints, rules, and regulations I have had plenty of fodder for my column. May I say, “So long and thanks for all the rules.”

Follow me on Twitter @JDelBuono.

Joanna DelBuono writes about national issues every Wednesday on BrooklynDaily.com. E-mail her at jdelbuono@cnglocal.com.