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Middle-aged jerk beats cousin with pipe

90th Precinct

Southside–Williamsburg

Pipe down

Cops cuffed a middle-aged man who they say beat his teenage cousin with a pipe on Gerry Street on Feb. 1.

The 19-year-old victim told police he was in his cousin’s home between Broadway and Throop Avenue at 8:10 pm when the 52-year-old jerk bashed him with a pipe, leaving cuts and bruises on his right forearm. Cops charged the goon with assault.

Con Ed con

A small business owner on Harrison Place was the latest sucker to fall for a scammer who has been calling small businesses posing as a bill collector and getting them to turn over cash, cops said.

The caller, who pretended to be from Con Edison, phoned the business between Varick and Porter avenues on Jan. 27.

“If you don’t pay we are going to shut you down for three days,” the voice on the phone told the business owner, who then went to a nearby store and bought $1,000 in prepaid cards and gave the caller the PIN number, according to police.

Angry bird

An opportunistic thief snatched an iPhone out of a woman’s hand as she was playing a video game on the G train at the Flushing Avenue subway stop on Jan. 27, police reported.

The 26-year-old victim said she was on the train at the corner of Marcy Avenue and Wallabout Street at 6:30 pm, playing the game on her phone, when a man suddenly grabbed it out of her hands just as the train door was opening and ran out of the station.

Showtime

A bully robbed a teenager of his phone on Graham Avenue on Jan. 28, cops said.

The 15-year-old victim told police that he was between Maujer and Ten Eyck streets on his way to school at 7:45 am when an older kid started following him.

“What time is it?” the meanie supposedly asked.

When the younger boy pulled out his phone, the lowlife grabbed it and ran down Graham Avenue, police stated.

Nab-sack

Three young brutes strong-armed a woman as she was walking down the stairs of a Roebling Street building on Jan. 29 and stole her backpack, cops said.

The 19-year-old victim reported she was in the stairwell of the building between S. Ninth Street and Division Avenue at 7:30 pm when the three men surrounded her and pulled her knapsack out of her arms. The bag contained textbooks, $25 in cash, and the lady’s identification, according to police.

Bar hoppers

A trio of robbers attacked a drunk guy as he was coming out of a Graham Avenue bar on Jan. 30, said cops.

The 51-year-old victim told police he was walking out of the watering hole between Boerum and McKibbin streets at 3:40 am when the fearsome threesome surrounded him.

“Give me your money,” one of them supposedly said.

When the victim refused, the treacherous triumvirate punched him in the side of the head and cut his right index finger, then ran away without taking anything, cops said.

— Danielle Furfaro