Beside our many cruises — 102 so far — Carol and I do a lot of traveling by air. It seems that no matter where we are going, what airport we are in, what airline we are flying on, our gate is always the one farthest from the entrance.
We were booked on a Southwest flight from Fort Lauderdale to Islip and the folks in wheelchairs are always assisted in early boarding. That particular day the boarding was a bit slower than usual due to twenty passengers in wheelchairs. When the plane landed only two passengers needed assistance to disembark. All the others were apparently cured. Southwest must be the Lourdes of the skies. Any day now you will be boarding a Southwest airplane with walkers, crutches and wheelchairs hanging from the ceiling.
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We were aboard an American Airlines flight to Texas once when a man boarded shortly after we did and took a seat two rows ahead on the opposite aisle. He reached up and put his flight bag in the overhead compartment. Then he removed his outer jacket followed by a lightweight jacket and a sweater and placed them there. Knowing that those around him were watching, he shouted “I’ll be damned if I have to pay for luggage. I carry what I need aboard.”
“What about your underwear?” a woman asked. He answered that by pointing to his flight bag. I was curious to learn how he managed to sneak his razor aboard. He said that he doesn’t take one. He gets his toiletries from the desk clerks when he checks into any popular, moderately priced motel. I know that to be true because I get necessary items at those same motels when I forget to pack a toothbrush, comb or an item that I cannot find in my crammed suitcase.
“I pay for my ticket. I hate it when they nickel and dime me for everything else,” he said as he pulled a bagel sandwich from his pants pocket. “I’m shocked that they haven’t installed pay toilets yet” he joked.
Many of us are a bit ticked off having to pay for a suitcase. When fuel was very expensive the airlines offset the increased cost by charging us for baggage. Fuel prices have decreased significantly but they still charge us. James McElvar, a member of the band Rewind, refused to pay. To avoid the charges he wore twelve layers of clothes before boarding his flight to Glasgow. Good try, but it didn’t work out as he planned. He passed out from heat exhaustion.
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How many of us have had to change flights for whatever reason? The number of changed reservations must have been a lot larger than I can guess, because last year airlines in the United States billed passengers more than $3 billion in “changed fees” for cancelled or altered itineraries. How much did you have to shell out for your last modification? As of right now, the only airline that I know of that does it free of charge is Southwest Airlines. You will only have to pay the difference if your new flight is more expensive. That’s fair. It also doesn’t charge for luggage. I just wish it flew to more cities.
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So how do you really feel about airport body scans? I know that it doesn’t always work, but until something better is found, it still is somewhat of a deterrent. If some Transportation Security Administration agent gets his or her jollies by seeing a scan of this old, overweight body, then have fun.
I am StanG
