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Stan’s no ‘pigeon’

And the scams keep on coming and coming, and they never stop. Yesterday I was informed that I am the recipient of a seven-day Caribbean cruise for two — absolutely free of charge — leaving from San Juan, Puerto Rico.

“Hey that’s great. When? What ship? Send me the docs.”

“Sure. First I need some information. Will you be using a Visa or MasterCard?”

“Why do you need that? I thought the cruise is free.”

“Yes. The cruise is free, but we have to buy you the airline tickets to get you to San Juan.”

“Oh, that’s not necessary. We’ll fly there ourselves. My wife and I are both pilots and we own a Cessna.”

Click.

• • •

The Treasury Department will be issuing new $100 bills.

“Psst. I know a printer that works in the treasury and can get his hands on a truckload. He’s willing to sell them at half price. How many do you want?”

Yeah! Sure!

• • •
Right now, if I hurry, American Airlines will give me vouchers for five free airline tickets (not really) if I enter my private information for their eyes only. They want my credit card numbers, my passwords, and I’m sure you know the rest. Do people really fall for this? You bet they do. That’s why they keep on coming. It costs them nothing to send out e-mails, and if they can get two or three suckers a week, they can make a nice living. Just like the folks that fall for the e-mail from Discover that told me:

“This is your official notification that the services listed below will be deactivated and deleted if your profile is not verified immediately.”

It went on to inform me that I must log in now, enter my password and user ID information, or blah, blah, blah, and more blah.

To the sender of that e-mail: The jokes on you. I don’t have a Discover card.

• • •

Last week I received an official looking letter that read:

“Dear friend, I am Miss Susan Scrofa, a U.S. citizen and I am 37 years old. I did reside in Homer’s Bowel, Texas, and I have relocated since I am now very rich. I am one who took part in the United Nations Compensation Program in Nigeria…” Stop!

As soon as you see the word Nigeria, don’t bother reading anymore. The Nigerian scam is a con where a recent widow (or anyone) from Nigeria (or anywhere) contacts you with a sob story how she was cheated out of $10 million, $20 million, or $50 million dollars, and if you assist her in getting the money out of the country, she will split it with you. All you have to do is fill out certain information and wire her a small sum of money such as $200 or $300 in good faith. Hey, that’s not bad. All I have to do is send $200 and I receive $10 million. I know many people who have received these e-mails but I don’t know anyone who has fallen for this sting. Yet, they keep on coming.

• • •

“Quickly… Hurry… Right now… before it’s too late… Send me the required information and $50 so that you can receive your share of the one million pounds sterling in the Qatar Quick Pick Lottery from which your e-mail was chosen as the winner.”

Tempting, right? Wrong! I am StanGershbein@Bellsouth.net telling you that this is another perfect example of that old saying, “If it sounds too good to be true…” You know the rest.

Read Stan Gershbein’s column every Monday on BrooklynDaily.com.