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The road to yale begins at pre-K. Not. • Brooklyn Paper

The road to yale begins at pre-K. Not.

Can somebody smack some sense into this dumbed-down mom and her lawyer, too?

Nicole Imprescia is suing a York Avenue preschool because her darling 4-year-old daughter was forced to spend too much time with “lesser-minded 2- and 3-year-olds, and not focusing on test preparation to get into an elite elementary school.”

Well, excuse me.

Other 2- and 3-year-olds? How utterly horrible. So pedestrian. How much worse can it get than other 2- and 3-year-olds? My oh my.

Get real.

Hey, Ms. Imprescia, let me enlighten you. Your daughter is four. What possible outcome did you expect from pre-school, a scholarship to Yale at five? Hello, she’s four.

Let me repeat: She’s four!

The suit, for $19,000, also alleges her daughter, as well as the sons and daughters of the other parents, “were dumped amongst each other, notwithstanding their age differences.”

But it gets better:

According to Imprescia, the school was still teaching her precious little one “about shapes and colors.”

What did I say before? Oh, yeah: She’s four!

Did this mother of the child prodigy expect her daughter to be able to discuss the stars with Steven Hawkins while figuring out the vastness of space to the nearest quark after she stepped up from pre-school to kindergarten? IDK.

Pre-schoolers are supposed to color, finger paint, interact with other children and be kids. Learning colors, shapes, letters and how to fit in is the most important experience for pre-schoolers.

I’m not saying that her child isn’t brilliant, but let her be a kid. She has the next 20 years of her life to compete in the outside jungle, and I’m damn sure that if the kid is the next Albert Einstein, the genius gene will rear its enlarged cranium before she gets out of grade school.

For now, let her experience the joys of story time, sing-alongs, scrapped knees and tag in the schoolyard. Leave the tests for specialized schools in the distance, she’ll take them soon enough.

Not for Nuthin™, if there’s one life lesson that I have learned it’s this: enjoy every minute of your child’s childhood, embrace every giggle, hug and messy drawing, and linger over every mud pie and lemonade stand because it all goes by too quickly.

Before a parent blinks an eye, her child is a teen and then an adult and out into the world on her own. In the end, it isn’t the extra money she earns in her lifetime or the connections she makes, but the way she smiled when she saw you at the end of the school day.

The finger painting will remain on your fridge — and in your heart — long after she graduates from Yale.

These are the things that make us rich, the intangible tangibles and the legacies we leave behind. Not frivolous lawsuits.

jdelbuono@cnglocal.com

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