This thief opts for the real ‘Real Thing’

Real thing

Someone stole a case of real Coca-Cola from a delivery truck on Lorraine Street on April 28.

The 44-year-old driver said he parked near Columbia Street at 8 am, and when he returned at 12 pm, the case of pop — Coke made in Mexico with cane sugar instead of corn syrup — was gone.

The “Real Thing” with real sugar? It would be a crime not to steal it!

Gun goon

A man fired his handgun a man twice his age on Columbia Street on April 20.

The 46-year-old victim told cops that he and the assailant were arguing near W. Ninth Street at 12:40 pm when the thug suddenly fired a silver handgun in his direction in an attempt to “intimidate him.”

The creep, who sported a Caesar-style haircut, turned himself in to police the next day.

— Gary Buiso