Put the fun between your legs.
That is the motto of Bike Smut, a touring film festival that is not to be confused with Bike Feitsh Day. That festival’s name is a nod to the enthusiasm with which bicycle fanatics gather to gawk at the polished chrome and smooth rubber of the two-wheeled contraptions. But Bike Smut, which had its seventh annual annual romp on Friday at Bushwick’s Silent Barn, pairs ten-speeds and penny-farthings with actual pornography.
“It’s a sexual rainbow trust where people can be free to express their love of bikes and sex however they want,” said fest organizer Phil Sano, who travels the country on a bike-and-trailer combo he calls the Steely Wonder.
Earlier this summer, Sano left his hometown of Portland on Steely Wonder as he does every summer, to ride thousands of miles through the United States, Canada, and Mexico screening pedal-philic flicks.
This year’s festival, billed the Porny Express, featured an hour and a half of short smut selections. The first showed a guy pleasuring a gal by pedaling a Rube Goldberg-inspired, tall-bike-powered sex toy apparatus. Other premises included a group bike ride into the muddy swamps of Florida that ends dirtily, a German sex cult that turns new members into bicycles, and the adventures of a fetishist who trades bike tune-ups for erotic (to him) haircuts.
But the movie that best expressed the Porny Express theme was “The Hot, the Bold and the Foxy,” a thrilling, all-female remake of “The Good, the Bad and the Ugly,” complete with an Ennio Morricone soundtrack.
To Sano’s dismay, this year’s blue movie bash featured no films by New York City auteurs, so the nomadic porn peddler encouraged audience members to get busy making their own for next year.
In other words, Brooklyn, get on your bikes and ride.
