He’s Kentucky Fried Conned

Kentucky foiled

A gun-carrying hooligan held up a KFC employee who was on his way home and swiped more than $9,000 on Calyer Street on Oct. 1.

The victim told cops that he was on his way home from work, near Eckford Street, trying to deposit his (massive) paycheck at about 11:48 pm. The perp ran up behind him, held the gun to his back and said, “Don’t turn around or I’ll shoot you,” then ran his pockets and took the cash and an iPhone before fleeing.


Three louts held up a man and stole everything on him on Nassau Avenue on Sept. 28.

The victim told cops that he was near Diamond Street at about 1:30 am when the three approached — one of them wielding a handgun. Two perps ran his pockets while the other held the gun in his face, and the three made off with an iPhone, an iPod and cash.

Small time

A 15-year-old kid was arrested for stealing a whopping $4 from a classmate at Automotive HS on Sept. 29.

The victim was walking to class at the school on Bedford Avenue near Berry Street at around 10:30 am when the jerk kid stuffed his hand in the boy’s pocket, pulling out a wallet. The perp fled with the lunch money, but cops later arrested him.


Two teenaged cretins were arrested and another two are still on the loose after the four mugged a 31-year-old man on Lorimer Street on Oct. 2.

The man said that he was near Metropolitan Avenue at about 3 am when the four came up from behind, and one of them punched him in the head. Another demanded cash, and the victim handed over $500 — but a fire truck drove by and stopped the crime short.

The four fled, but cops caught up to two of them. The money wasn’t recovered.

Cops arrested!

Two punks posing as cops were arrested for holding up a 36-year-old woman in McGolrick Park on Oct. 3.

The woman told the real police that she was sitting on a bench at the park, which is near N. Henry Street, at about 5:10 am when the thugs approached. One of them demanded that she face the bench while the other noted, “I’m a police officer.” They ran her pockets and took several unidentified items, then fled. Cops caught up later and collared the faux-po’s.

Saw it all

Two thieves entered a storefront on Jewel Street and stole an Apple MacBook on Sept. 28 — while the store’s owner was watching.

The victim said that he saw the two pry open the front door at the shop, which is near Meserole Avenue, at about 1:20 am, steal the laptop and flee in a sedan. It’s unclear why he didn’t do anything while the crime occurred.

Home invasion

Some punks broke into a Dupont Street apartment and stole everything of value on Sept. 29.

The victim told cops that she went home, which is between Manhattan Avenue and McGuinness Boulevard, at about 3 pm and realized that the front door had been busted open. Inside, she noticed that her iPod, Xbox, TV, computer, cameras and credit cards were missing.


An apparent super-thug left no evidence but an open window when he broke into a Bedford Avenue apartment and stole a laptop and iPhone on Sept. 30.

The victim arrived at home near N. Seventh Street at about 3 am and noticed the stuff missing. He told cops that he had left the window unlocked.

Hulkin’ ATM

A hooded brute smashed open an ATM by pulling it with his van on Lorimer Street on Sept. 28, and made off with $5,620.

The ATM’s owner told cops that he caught the jerk on tape at around 2:18 am tying a chain to the machine and his van near Bayard Street, then driving back and forth until the ATM fell over and broke open. The thug made off with a whole bunch of cash, and the victim couldn’t identify him.

— Andy Campbell