Mau Mau-ing the singles hitters! Low-ranked team beats Never Scared

The rain came down Sunday, but the Mau Mau’s resolve never wilted, as it knocked off second-ranked Never Scared in the night’s — and possibly the season’s — biggest upset.

The Mau Mau’s have the second-worst record in the league, with a 4-10 record, but the team was able to stave off one of the Brooklyn Kickball’s strongest powers behind the leadership of captain Kate “Atticus” Fitch, a five-run rally in the second inning, and a finishing kick from “Doe-Eyed” Doug Boes that provided the winning margin, 7–6.

“We’ve had a season with a very rough schedule,” said designated hitter Damien “Cujo” DeFrances, who was on the disabled list after tweaking his knee at the gym. “Even though we’ve been tested time and time again, this schedule showed what we’re made of against Never Scared.”

Over at the main field, in what was likely the season’s longest game, the 10th-ranked John Cougar Mellencamps smothered Hot Mess, 8–1, in a five-inning game that started at 9:30 pm and did not end until 10:45 pm. But the Mellencamps had one more match to play, a winning effort over the Dolls Kicking Balls, which didn’t end until 11:30 pm.

“Pitchers cannot master rolling the ball,” said League Commissioner Kevin “Commish” Dailey, who umped the beginning of the game. “It took forever. It’s ridiculous. I got so frustrated, I walked off.”

In other games, fifth-ranked Crucial Taunt manhandled Salute Your Jorts, 8–0, after the Jorts amassed four errors in one inning, which led to six unearned runs. Fourth-ranked Bacon Bits’ balanced attack undid Divine Sisterhood of Traveling Ya Yas and Regression Aggression, as both winning teams fight for high playoff seeds next month.

But the Sisterhood struck earlier that night with a come-from-behind victory over the much-improved Pony Boys, by a score of 4–3.

In the bottom of the fifth inning, with the Pony Boys leading 3–1, the Sisterhood tied the game up on a hit and run, and the Pony Boys failed to make an out at the plate. In a Jet Blue flight attendant moment of sheer frustration, the catcher kicked the ball into the field, which allowed the winning run to score from third.

“He kust kicked the ball away,” said Sisterhood captain Brian “The Cellophane Coyote” Ries. “We felt kind of bad for him, but that’s kickball.

Ries believes that his team has turned its season around after a slow start. He called his team together after a couple of particularly brutal losses for a strategy session at Matchless, and changed the lineup, which has led to several recent victories over teams that have underestimated its talent.

“We have three sisters, they’re not twins, but around the same age and they play soccer in college,” said Ries. “Every time they come up people move in and the girls wallop it over their heads.”

But the Ponyboys aren’t disconcerted by the loss, which came after three weeks of inactivity. Team captain Anthony “Sam” Sneed has been able to find the balance between winning and having fun, which has led to its surprising season including a tie of the John Cougar Mellencamps and victories over several top teams.

“I’ve been on teams that weren’t having fun, just trying to win, and misdirected in the sense,” said Sneed. “In the end, you just end up wearing yourself out but we try to have an enjoyable Sunday.”

Dailey thinks that the Pony Boys are this year’s dark horse based on its extremely competitive play this season.

“I believe during playoffs, they will do something,” said Dailey. “They will definitely play somebody big out.”

Brooklyn Kickball at McCarren Park ball fields (Bedford Street at N. 14th Street), Sundays 1–11 pm.

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