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Hey, Mom, I’m being robbed!

90th Precinct

Southside–Bushwick

Momma’s boy

A man had his MacBook stolen on Broadway on Oct. 9.

The victim told cops that he was between Havemeyer Street and Marcy Avenue and conversing online with his mother at 11:26 pm when a masked man approached and grabbed the laptop. After a brief struggle, the thief overpowered the man and got away with the computer, the visage of his mother still on the screen.

Plate cracker

A burglar struck a church on Montrose Avenue last week.

The church reported to police that the burglar went through the rear entrance of the house of worship between Manhattan and Graham avenues sometime between Sept. 29 and Oct. 8, taking $1,300 from the safe.

Pipe down

A mugger stole a woman’s iPhone in her own building on S. Fifth Street on Oct. 7.

The woman was entering her building between Bedford and Driggs avenues at about 5:23 pm when the thief pushed her into a hallway, displayed a pipe, and demanded, “Shut up, give me your money!”

She gave up her wallet and her iPhone.

Double take

A thief stole a woman’s purse on her Scholes Street doorstep on Oct. 7.

The victim was unlocking her front door between Lorimer Street and Union Avenue at 7:55 pm when the robber approached from behind, showed a knife, and warned, “Don’t say anything, and just give me your bag.”

He took the bag and left, but then doubled back and got her phone also.

Creep crook

A creep stole a woman’s purse in her Siegel Street building on Oct. 6.

The woman was between Bogart and White streets at 11:05 pm when the thief made his move.

He first implied that he had a weapon, then said, “Hey, baby, give me your bags.”

He then took the bag, which contained an iPhone and a wallet, and fled on a bicycle.

Rise and steal

Two thugs stole a man’s phone on Berry Street on Oct. 6.

The victim was heading to the Bedford Avenue train station at 6:35 am when he was approached by two early-bird-burglars.

The thugs knocked him to the ground, and one took his phone and wallet, demanding, “Give me your money or I’m going to kill you. Don’t look at me!”

Check off

A thief swiped a big check on Grand Street on Oct. 3.

The victim was walking to the bank near Graham Avenue at 5:50 pm to deposit a $1,000 check, but the thief approached from behind, and snatched the banknote.

Box-cut bandit

A jerk stole a purse on Stagg Street on Oct. 3.

The victim was between Union Avenue and Lorimer Street at 10:22 pm when she was approached by the thief, who displayed a box-cutter and warned, “Don’t say a word. Give me everything in your purse or I will cut you.”

He took her iPhone and her purse, and fled on a bicycle.

Bank heist

A crook stole thousands from a Grand Street bank on Oct. 4.

The thief entered the Washington Mutual branch between Graham Avenue and Humboldt Street at 11:12 am, walked to the teller. and passed a note demanding cash. The teller complied, and the thief left with $7,800.

School bandits

Two jerks stole a boy’s phone by a Bushwick Place school on Oct. 4.

The victim was hanging around the handball courts near Meserole Street after school at 3:40 pm when the duo approached. One thief demanded, “Give me your phone,” which was promptly snatched.

Punched out

A pair of thieves assaulted a man and stole his phone on Maujer Street on Sept. 25.

The victim was near Leonard Street at 10 pm when the thieves approached from behind, punched him in the head and took his phone.

Cops arrested a 15-year-old boy on Oct. 4 and charged him.

Quick pick

A pickpocketing duo stole a phone on Grand Street on Oct. 4.

The victim said he was near Lorimer Street at 1:40 pm when one thief snatched a phone clipped onto the victim’s pants.

Road rage

At least four vehicles were swiped last week:

• A thief stole a motorcycle on Broadway between Cook and Debevoise streets on Oct. 9. The victim last saw his red 2007 Kawasaki motorcycle at 4 am.

• A thief took a car on Union Avenue between Devoe and Ainslie streets on Oct. 7. The victim parked the 2007 Saturn Ion at 9:40 pm.

• A thief took a Toyota on Roebling Street between S. Second and S. Third streets between 10:30 pm on Oct. 7 and 7:30 the next morning.

• A car-jacker got away with a Ford on Throop Avenue between Thorton and Whipple streets overnight Oct. 6. The owner parked at 9 pm, but the car was gone by 11:26 the next day.

— Alfred Ng